Latest Posts by bluefood-chb - Page 2

lucissa post of the day but one of my favorite headcanons for them is that they weren't really the match narcissa's family had in mind for her. the malfoys are filthy rich, but we have canon info that they did sometimes marry half bloods to yk avoid inbreeding, even bellatrix diminishes lucius on this basis, favoring the Crouch family, saying that they're one of the only true purebloods left.. It got me thinking that lucius was not considered pure enough for the Blacks and a huge fight ensued, the first involving narcissa, because she was promised to wed a Crouch (diff branch than Barty) but she put her foot down that she did want to marry her boyfailure way-too-blonde high school sweetheart.. it worked and they eventually warmed up to him a bit (but Bella ofc) and it ended up being pretty nice because money and they actually loved each other so

Qin Su's death ~ live reactions

bonus:

(i like to think nie husiang’s entire existence is just a stream of continuous  flustered internal screaming upon being Chosen™ by this really weird grumpy dog with abandonment issues,)

where in nhs hits the husband jackpot and he’s even more shameless about it than wei wuxian 

to wwx’s immense chagrin they’ve unfortunately Unionized™

(another messy chengsang meme comic since its been a few weeks)

WWX:  …… Is. Is this what karma is?? I don’t want it take it back–

(i am of the firm belief that the chengsang dynamic becomes 1000% funnier if you add distressed brother wwx lmao)

bonus:

somehow their different cross-media designs give off different vibes/ship dynamics to me, i just thought it'd be fun to draw it out lol

(also i love their mobile designs they're so pretty ;v;)

[I doubt this will be done by Nie Huaisang's birthday, but we'll see.]

Jiang Cheng looked different.

Not drastically so, of course, but to the eyes of someone who has spent an inordinate amount of time cataloguing his features, the way he moved, every minute detail about him, the differences were undeniable.

To someone like Nie Huaisang.

He had always been tall and handsome and well-built, of course. Nie Huaisang hadn't been able to look away, from the moment Jiang Cheng and his shixiong had arrived at the Cloud Recesses all those years ago. (Had it really been five years? It seemed like it was just yesterday. It seemed like several lifetimes.) Nie Huaisang's eyes were always drawn to him, drinking in everything about him, committing it to memory so he could recreate it with his brush by candlelight. He had filled so much paper with Jiang Cheng's likeness, really it was a wonder that Jiang Cheng never found them in his room. That would have been so embarrassing, and difficult to explain away.

The point was, at fifteen, Jiang Cheng had already been the most beautiful boy Nie Huaisang had ever seen. But now… he was taller for one. They both were, but comparatively the height difference was greater than it had been five years ago. His chest was broader, tapering down to a waist just as narrow as it had been. He had already been strong and sleekly muscled, Nie Huaisang had seen that plenty of times, when they had snuck to the creek and Jiang Cheng had swam in only his trousers. (Nie Huaisang hadn't known how to swim, he never ventured far into the water. Jiang Cheng swam like he'd been born in the water.) Jiang Cheng had filled out since then, the flowing silk of his sleeves could not hide the bulge of his biceps, and the collars of his robe strained to cross over his pectorals.

And his face. Five years, grief and war had melted away what baby fat had still been there at fifteen. His cheekbones were now exquisitely defined, his jawline so sharp that Nie Huaisang wondered if it could possibly cut his skin if he ran his fingers on it.

He had learned to school his expressions better, befitting the leader of a major clan.(It didn't matter that Yunmeng Jiang had been decimated, that its ranks were full of rogues or new recruits younger even than their leader, Jiang Cheng stood proud and commanding and if not everyone agreed that it was still one of the great clans, Nie Huaisang was certain that they would before long). But his eyes. No matter how impassive and dignified his expression, Jiang Cheng's eyes were full of storms, emotion shone in them like the crackle of electricity at his fingers.

Those eyes widened now, as he saw Nie Huaisang coming towards him. They softened, like clouds clearing after a storm, and those lips that Nie Huaisang had drawn so many times, had dreamed of so many nights, those lips quirked up into a smile. For him.

Without saying anything, and before Nie Huaisang could react, Jiang Cheng strode across the distance between them and enveloped him in a fierce hug, strong arms tight around him.

He really was substantially taller than Nie Huaisang than before. It was a little bit like being hugged by dage. Well, not really. Dage's hugs didn't set his heart racing like this, after all.

Nie Huaisang let Jiang Cheng pull him up on tiptoes while Jiang Cheng hunched protectively around him, bowing his head so his lips were by Nie Huaisang's ear.

"It's so good to see you," his voice was a raspy whisper. It made Nie Huaisang's hands clutch tightly at his robes.

How long had it been since they'd last seen each other? Nie Huaisang couldn't recall. Months. Not quite a year. Too long.

Jiang Cheng finally released him, setting him back on his heels and stepped back, looking a little sheepish at his display.

Nie Huaisang hastily straightened his robes before clasping his hands together in a bow. "Jiang-zongzhu."

Jiang Cheng rolled his eyes at him. "Don't do that, Huaisang, there's no need."

He ducked his head to hide his smile. He would have pulled out his fan, snapped it open to hide behind, but something in Jiang Cheng's intense gaze stopped him.

"Jiang-xiong," he amended.

"Better," Jiang Cheng scoffed, lips quirking into a smile. He held out his arm and Nie Huaisang slipped his hand through. It felt comforting and familiar to walk arm in arm with Jiang Cheng like this, in this place.

"I only heard that you arrived a little while ago," Nie Huaisang said. "I'm glad I caught you before you left."

"I'm staying the night," Jiang Cheng said. "Besides, I wouldn't have left without seeing you."

au where wwx and the wen remnants dont die and a-yuan stops calling him xian-gege and starts calling him a-niang because wwx birthed him from his own body and everyone understands its a cute little joke

until a-yuan very seriously calls jiang cheng jiujiu. not shushu. because jiang cheng is his MOTHERS brother

and the stubborn arguments between this grown ass man and a literal child just get louder and more hilarious to watch as the years pass, with sizhui still calling him jiujiu and jiang cheng yelling back SHUSHU every time before he just starts ignoring his nephew every time he says jiujiu

Prettiest fish prince 🐠

IG: rayviolifordinner

the sun and his little star ☀️🌟

So I saw this post. And instead of drawing Wangxian or anyone else who’s actually mentioned I drew my darling boy Jiang Cheng taking care of his Pokémon, 

*me, getting out of my dissociative state to log back on my mdzs bullshit for a hot second:* there really wasn't much of a choice for Nie Huaisang but to send those girls with Jiang Cheng. No matter how upright Lan Xichen was, he didn't trust him enough to play the role of a neutral judge given how close he was to Jin Guangyao. Nie Huaisang couldn't take care of that part without disturbing the wishy-washy persona he carefully crafted for himself in front of the entire world. But Jiang Cheng? Relentless. A dog with a bone. He'd get to the bottom of the matter and dig out all the facts in less than 2 hours, never mind if someone he should be cultivating strong and stable alliances with is at the centre of the storm. Trust the leader of the sect represented by the flower that blooms in the mud to lend his ear to a servant girl and a prostitute.

Why is Jin Ling the way that he is (85% Jiang Cheng by mass), despite having presumably been raised mostly in Lanling - you know, the sect he’s going to inherit? A series of headcanons by me:

For at least a year following his brother’s the Yiling Patriarch’s apparent death, Jiang Cheng had a vibe like he was one word, half a sideways glance, a single split hair from snapping and killing everyone in this room and then himself. This only intensified when he was holding his sister’s son. And he held his sister’s son whenever physically possible. So they, uh. They let him keep the baby. Jin Guangshan was furious when Sect Leader Jiang just kind of stormed into Carp Tower and took his grandson, and everyone let him, but he finally saw Jiang Cheng face to face and it was like…you know what you can keep him. It’s okay. It wasn’t even a politically manipulable rage, it was so ABUNDANTLY clear that anyone who tried would also die. So Jin Ling lived in Lotus Pier and was carried around by his uncle like 24/7.

When this was starting to abate, Jin Guangyao’s son, Jin Rusong, was born. Coincidentally and tragically, Jin Guangshan dies shortly thereafter. 

Not in words, no, goodness no. Not even in actions. Maybe in non-actions - in Jin Ling only being invited to spend about one week out of every four in Carp Tower, in Jiang Cheng making no real move to find a wife - Jiang Cheng and Jin Guangyao have an agreement for several years. If one day Jin Ling were to give up to his cousin his claim on LanlingJin, and inherit YunmengJiang instead…that’d be okay. 

Then Jin Rusong dies and Jin Guangyao is a practical man, and begrudgingly so is Jiang Cheng: Jin Ling really needs to be spending more like 3 weeks in Carp Tower to every 1 in Lotus Pier. He needs to be raised by his father’s family, of whom he will one day be the head.

But it’s TOO LATE! The boy has spent his impactful first like five years learning to be shouty and straightforward! And moreover, Jiang Cheng has, uh, opinions about things, so little Jin Ling’s gonna hear Jin Guangyao and Qin Su’s advice to, like, smile and make friends even when he doesn’t want to, and he’ll be like, “well that’s DUMB. I WON’T.” They’re probably genuinely trying to parent him and still! This is how it goes! 

Maybe it would’ve sunk in eventually, but he kept going back to Lotus Pier for a week out of every month for positive reinforcement - because you cannot actually tell me that even when Jin Ling was at his brattiest, the entirety of Jiang Sect didn’t pick up on their sect leader’s energy of “this child will be CHERISHED or YOU WILL ALL DIE.” Not, you know, explicitly cherished, but…it beats the annoying court politics and terrible cousins of Carp Tower hands down

(in fact, you KNOW Jin Guangyao could’ve somehow arranged for Jin Ling to have more friends at Carp Tower, and instead he actively chose to be sure he would be Jin Ling’s only real ally there, and tbh that’s why he needed to die.)

TLDR Jin Ling imprinted early on the angry grape and part of that imprinting meant he was resistant to all other options for how to be, and also it got continuously reinforced by the directions from which he did and did not receive love

Thank you for coming to my ted talk.

went into a fugue state and had to draw some Jiang Cheng and his cub

bun puns

what wimmin, why walmon, who whoman…

So from my understanding all of Lotus Pier was razed to the ground and Jiang Cheng has to rebuild it. But he was all alone. Do think he rebuilt his family rooms? The shared places in the same way?

Another mixed concept and scene snippet post from twitter. This one I actually hammered out a quick ending to!

Nie Huaisang is the insecure one of the relationship for a change. 

Even though they’ve been together from the end of lectures all the way through the Sunshot Campaign, even though Jiang Cheng always turns them down, even though Jiang Cheng chased off the matchmakers, there's always someone drawn in by Jiang Cheng’s pretty face or the allure of the Jiang-furen. 

And, eventually, Jiang Cheng will have to find himself a wife. 

An actual wife. 

Nie Huaisang can handle dealing with merchants and accounts and stuff like that, he’d even force himself to do it for the rest of his life if he has to, but there's so much more that would be expected of a wife and even if he were to learn it all, the etiquette and everything, he's still not a woman. He can’t give Jiang Cheng heirs of his own bloodline, and he knows how important that is.

So even though he does his best to help out with rebuilding the Pier, Nie Huaisang makes himself scarce if there's even a hint of flirting because if this is going to be the one that Jiang Cheng reciprocates, he doesn't want to be there to see it.

He even stays through the fallout and the first siege, only for a new problem to pop up as the dust settles.

On top of everything else, Jin Ling can’t stand him. Even at that age where babies are upset about everything, it's clear Nie Huaisang is his least favorite adult, even though Nie Huaisang is doing his best, and is actually doing things correctly 95% of the time.

It's absolutely crushing. It's worse than the flirting, worse than the proposal letters, because he knows more than anything, Jiang Cheng needs a partner who can do right by his nephew.

As Jin Ling howls angrily in his arms, only to immediately quiet as soon as someone else takes him, Nie Huaisang finally starts contemplating throwing in the towel and letting Jiang Cheng find someone who actually deserves to be by his side. 

And eventually… he does give up and break things off. 

Not wanting to leave Jiang Cheng feeling like he's in the wrong, he explains everything before he quietly goes back to Qinghe.

Unbeknownst to him, Jiang Cheng takes this as a challenge. 

Nie Huaisang left because people wanted him to marry better? Fine! He finally accepts the matchmakers' attempts to set him up, and then purposely bombs the dates. When rumors start getting out, he pays the matchmakers to support them.

He can't do anything about the fact that Jin Ling doesn't like Nie Huaisang, and that guts him, because his nephew comes first. But Jin Ling's a baby, surely his opinion will change as he grows? 

Right?

He can make this work. He will make this work.

It's been a year and a half since he and Nie Huaisang have seen each other in person, but they've been tentatively exchanging letters. 

When Jiang Cheng arrives at the conference in Qinghe, he takes the first day to gather his nerves. On the second day, he thinks he's ready.

And then the screaming panic erupts in the courtyard.

---

From there, it goes as canon did. Nie Huaisang grows distant as he sinks into grief and revenge and Jiang Cheng throws himself into running the sect and raising Jin Ling. 

(Neither of them ever tells Jin Ling about their history together, so he grows up having never known they were even an item, just that Nie Huaisang is that weird annoying guy who's always pestering shushu. Ironic that he ends up remaining completely disdainful of Nie Huaisang his whole childhood, but for totally different reasons.)

It's painful and bewildering to see the way Nie Huaisang acts around Lan Xichen and Jin Guangyao, because Nie Huaisang wasn't that clingy with him even when they were lovers.

(Once the final confrontation at the temple concludes, Jiang Cheng realizes that Nie Huaisang might have been shielding him from All Of That, but he's still kind of hurt and confused.)

Something forces them to talk: Jin Ling eventually does find out about their backstory.

Not the actual backstory, of course, but during a 'friendly' night hunt, Wei Wuxian offhandedly muses about the fact that Jiang Cheng and Nie Huaisang aren't together anymore.

Wait, when were they ever together???? 

"Oh, it ended before you were even old enough to remember?" Wei Wuxian asks. "Though I guess that's not surprising, since you were only three when Chifeng-zun died."

"It was probably because even they couldn't stand each other for long," Lan Jingyi says, earning a swat from Ouyang Zizhen.

But Wei Wuxian just grins and says "Yeah, that's probable, too," or something like that. Jin Ling doesn't really hear it clearly because he's already mad and stewing in his own thoughts.

His jiujiu-! With that guy-!

And he's going to get to the bottom of this. Since his jiujiu never said anything about Nie-zongzhu all those years, good or bad, he knows he won't get any information that way, and even though he grew up seeing Nie-zongzhu as a silly harmless annoyance, recent discussions mean he doesn't feel comfortable going to the Unclean Realms either.

Time to start asking the Jiang sect’s second-in-command some questions. 

---

Jin Ling doesn’t get much, but he gets enough that he knows he’s going to have to press Nie-zongzhu for the full story. 

So he sucks up his nerve and heads to the Unclean Realms.

He’s received with little fanfare, but when Nie Huaisang offers tea, he can tell by the smell that it’s his jiujiu’s favorite, and he can’t help but wonder which of them loved it first.

It throws him off guard enough that rather than the snippy confrontation he had been planning on the way over, the first question out of his mouth is “Do you regret any of it?”

Nie Huaisang tilts his head, expression uncomfortably probing. Jin Ling braces himself for the usual deflections and protestations of ignorance, but whatever Nie Huaisang sees makes him simply sigh instead. “Your shenshen. I never predicted she would react the way she did. I thought she would go home to her parents.”

“What about the cu- Mo Xuanyu? Did you make him do it?”

“No. It was his idea to begin with, actually. But there was a possibility, however small, that I could have stopped him, and I never tried.”

Jin Ling is… not sure exactly how he feels about the answers he’s been given. But he does believe them. So he closes his eyes, takes a deep breath, lets it out… and without any of the irritation he’d been carrying with him on the way, asks the question that has really sparked this visit.

“Did you break up with jiujiu because of me?”

Nie Huaisang chokes on his tea. “Where did you hear that from?” he wheezes after getting the coughing under control.

“Not any one person in particular. I heard you’d been together from shijiu, and started putting the pieces together after talking to some others,” Jin Ling only partially lies, not wanting to put his jiujiu’s second in any possible line of fire. “Did you?”

Nie Huaisang rubs between his eyes, and it looks like he won’t answer at first. “It wasn’t your fault,” he finally says. “There were over a dozen different issues that probably would have sunk us eventually. We’d been keeping the relationship quiet during the rebuilding, so there were potential wives being tossed in his path constantly, none of which I could measure up to.”

“He would have picked you anyway,” Jin Ling says, eyes narrowed. “So tell me the real reason.”

“I did. Choosing me would have only put more stress on him, especially since-”

“Since what?”

“Since nothing.”

“So it did have something to do with me.”

“Jin-zongzhu-”

“Tell me,” Jin Ling insists, practically leaning over the table.

Nie Huaisang scrubs his face with his hands. “Fine. Fine. I hated seeing how miserable he was having to split time between us because you screamed yourself blue if someone tried to hand you to me. I wasn’t going to make him choose, and I wasn’t going to make him feel guilty when he inevitably chose you. It was better for both of you to just take myself out of the running.”

Jin Ling sits back down and processes this, remembering all the times he’d heard his jiujiu absolutely shut down a dinner date with anyone. How he always changed the subject when Jin Ling brought up the question of why he hadn't married yet.

He must have been missing Nie Huaisang the whole time, and it’s clear just from watching Nie Huaisang during this discussion that he’d been hurting too. And yet they’d never breathed a word about it around him because they didn’t want him thinking he’d ruined things for them.

“Okay,” he says finally. “I’m summoning jiujiu here and we’re discussing this in full.”

“What?”

—

Things finally seem to be going well. With Jin Ling's blessing, Jiang Cheng and Nie Huaisang are tentatively mending the bond between them.

And then a night hunt goes horribly wrong, with Jiang Cheng taking a blow that would have killed his nephew and once-shixiong. Much to everyone's surprise, including his own, he ascends.

As a god of devotion.

He laughs until he realizes the other gods are serious, and then he's bewildered and angry because why him?

Worst of all, he can't leave the heavens without permission for literal years because he has to 'settle in' first, which just seems like a lot of bureaucratic bullshit to him.

—

Of course he goes to Jin Ling first, who's now fully-grown and well-established, but still greets him with tears and a fierce hug like a kid. After they've spent almost the whole day catching up, Jin Ling suddenly gets very quiet and serious. "You might want to go see Huaisang next. Before it's too late."

Jiang Cheng stiffens. "I was already planning on it, but what the hell do you mean 'too late'?"

"He's... really not been doing well since you ascended. I think the only things still keeping him alive at this point are his promise to his brother and the fact that the disciples insist on taking care of him even though he abdicated."

Jiang Cheng feels sick, because he knows.

He knows why.

He thanks Jin Ling and, in a blink, he's at the Unclean Realms. Ignoring the stunned reactions, he turns to the man he recognizes as having been the head disciple the last time he visited and is likely the sect leader now. "Where is he?"

He's guided to a set of rooms deep in the side of the mountain, where the only light is from torches and lanterns and candles. When he enters the door indicated for him, the sight inside makes his stomach drop.

Nie Huaisang is sleeping on a bed of furs and soft pillows, an array Jiang Cheng can't identify stitched over the chest of carefully arranged robes. Despite the fact that his face is still smooth and unlined, there are silver streaks among the braids in his hair. He's far too thin and just... looks ill. 

Kneeling beside the low bed, Jiang Cheng reaches out to touch his cheek, his hair, something, but his presence rouses his former lover before he can make contact.

Nie Huaisang blinks at him, then smiles, but his gaze isn't focusing right. "Ah, Cheng-er, look at you," he murmurs, barely audible. "Always knew you were too good for a monster like me."

—

Nie Huaisang only lives long enough to complete the purification ritual.

Jiang Cheng decides to remain on earth, waiting. He passes the time by occasionally checking in with the sect, or with Jin Ling, or even with Wei Wuxian, the shock of his ascension having forced them to have some very weighty conversations.

It takes another fifty years, but eventually he crosses paths with a young man who has familiar green eyes and an even more familiar infectious laugh. 

One funny scenario that came to my mind is that when Jin Ling finally becomes a full-fledged sect leader, and gains some self-confidence and pulls the Jin out of the swamp Menu Yao pushed it in...

And then he has to deal with Huanguang-Jun as the Chief Cultivator. Fuck that.

Others may respect the man and his "righteousness" but Jin Ling knows what sort of a petty gremlin the man is. Can still be. And he knows that Lan Wangji has the political acumen of a footstool. And still has it out for anyone who ever slighted his idiot husband.

Jin Ling has no time and patience to deal with that. He cannot make waves or go against the man, his position is barely stable after all, but Jiujiu raised no bitch and Xiao-shushu raised no idiot.

Thus, when Huanguang-Jun pisses him off to much, Jin Sect Leader sends a polite letter to the Lan Sect Leader requesting the return of all the loans the Jin has issued to Gusu Lan since the war. After all, they were marked as "loans" in the official paperwork and the understanding they don't have to be returned only existed between Lan Xichen and Jin Guangyao, the terrible criminal. One could say that the money was, gasp, mishandled by the man, as none of the sect elders signed off these loans.

That was really a lot of money, and Jin Rulan had a project in mind to build some orphanages and needed liquid funds. Urgently.

Say what you will about Jin Guangyao, but his bookkeeping was impeccable, and Jin Ling had bunches of receipts at the ready.

Also, there were these 200 spirit nets Huanguang-Jun destroyed five years ago. These weren't cheap. As they were Jiang Sect's personal gift to him, Jin Rulan would like to be reimbursed for the loss. As soon as possible.

Yes, he was aware that Gus Lan didn't have such amounts just laying around and trying to organise them may as well bankrupt the sect. Isn't that a pity. He feels for them, truly. But money is money and one needs to keep an eye on their assets.

Of course, he'd be amendable to forgetting some of these debts if properly motivated.

Say, Jin Rulan would be willing to let the matter go if, for example, the Chief Cultivator kindly fucked off.

spending time with 舅舅

looking for fics about your favorite character on ao3 be like:

dont care

dont care

dont care

what the actual fuck

dont care

ooh that sounds- what the fuck

unfinished

don't care

the best fic ive ever read in my life. this absolutely ruined me and ill never be the same ever again

dont care

Strong Nie Huaisang is strong (and a delicate flower)

Sangcheng week Day 1 - Occasions

🪷 While a cultivation conference was being held in Yunmeng Jiang, the Jiang-zongzhu and Nie-zongzhu rested together. In the morning, Jiang-zhonghzu would cut off the sleeve of his robes, so as not to rouse his resting lover, not knowing that said man would flaunt the piece later for all to see. 🪷

lol this was supposed to a proper two-parter to tie in the point together more clearly and all but...... i just didn't feel like finishing this part ngl so all you get is a sketch hjdsh

also dont think too hard about why would JC go to the conference in the ruined robes or why didn't he take them off in the first place when going to sleep or how did NHS manage to get it together so quickly just. don't worry about that ok. plot convenience jfhkd

close-ups of the girlies. yes lines only cuz im lines lover and colours hater (more like failure lol dfhkjh)

OH YEA BTW for those who dont know ye this is obvs a reference to the emperor Ai of Han and the whole cutsleeve thing lol

au where nhs doesn't have to girlboss and can just be malewife <3

Something something Jiang Cheng and Nie Huaisang both losing their entire families to horrible violence and betrayal

Something something Jiang Cheng and Nie Huaisang both having the responsibility of leading a clan thrust on them before they were ready

Something something Jiang Cheng and Nie Huaisang both devoting their adult lives to revenge and looking down the barrel of their futures after Guanyin Temple, not knowing who they are without their anger

Something something Jiang Cheng and Nie Huaisang being the only people who can truly understand each other

Sangcheng week Day 5 - Collaboration

sorry all that i can offer for today is a silly doodle because i ran out of time lol the collaboration is JL JC and NHS commitment to the bit.

(i dont know if its readable so im putting transcription under cut)

wwx: you know a-ling, we should find your jiujiu a nice madame…maybe that’ll finally help his temper (lol) (shame that he is blacklisted everywhere haha)

jl: what are you talking about. jiujiu and Nie-zongzhu have been together for years

wwx: (a-ling are you /srs or /j)

jl: [acting casual but cackling inside] [gave sangcheng his blessing with the condition that he’ll get to break it to wwx]

----------

wwx: -and you didnt tell me?!??

jc: says the one who secretly eloped?

wwx: but! but! Nie Huaisang?? did you not listen to what i told you?

jc: yeah i did. So we talked it out like adults. we disagreed on things but its ok now.

----------

the “talking out”: 

jc: -ARE YOU INSANE???!-

nhs: lower your voice wanyin.

I love my class it's so chaotic.

Our substitute Maths teacher is leaving at the end of next week (we've had him since the beginning of the year) and we want to buy him something. So a guy went to the mall to buy a chocolate box at the chocolate shop.

Dude: The chocolate shop is closed.

Me: It must not be considered as an essential shop.

Girl: I think the Fnac (multimedia store) is open.

Me: THAT counts as essential?

Guy: it is. I don't know why though.

Girl: We could buy him an Xbox game.

Guy: Why tf?

Me: we don't even know whether he has an Xbox.

Girl: yes we do.

Me: How???

Girl: someone found his wedding gift list on the internet a while ago.

An other guy: A game is a good idea.

Girl: It will last longer than food.

A third guy: It's on his wedding list but we don't know whether he has one.

Fourth guy: wait how did we find his wedding list?

Third guy: We could buy him the Xbox itself.

Girl, replying to fourth guy: well, you're the computer science expert

Third guy: there's a difference between computer science and stalking people.

Second guy: didn't he need a couch too?

me, pointing to directions for a lab: i can't read this!!! i'm illiterate!!!

my friend: didn't you finish a 500 page book in a day once?

me: my past does not define me.

I join the Discord server

I mute the Discord server

I'm never seen again in the Discord server