No but seriously, their capacious fur have me flinged to oblivion itself
I love your works but do you kind putting an eyestrain warning on ur rainbow posts ;_; it's ok if not, I don't mind.. I just don't want to have to block you for it since I like ur writings
Sure, but how do i do that? Should i write on the top "EYESTRAIN" or is it better to put a picture saying that, and then the rainbow text at the bottom?
Also i got 2 posts that contain the rainbow texts, so if you could reply to the one u were talking about, then i would help a lot :)
Also it might help, but if you go to settings-account settings, and click on the color palette, you can choose what mode u want
Maybe the dark mode will help?
Like if standardization wasn't common in alien life, we just showed them how easy is it, if they just standardized things. It would be like-
Little human: We have to upgarde parts for spaceship thrusters
Alien: Ohh, little one, because your kind has only had FTL travel for 3 cycles you mustn't understand. A thruster from some other human ship wouldn't just PLUG into your space ship. You would have to find the exact same ship but with better thrusters, but oh, each thruster is especially made for the ship.
Little human: Each thruster isn't especially made for ships. we just have to find a thruster with a E20-1 plug because all human spaceships have a E20-1 port.
Alien: What?
Little human: Its really simple, ANY E20-1 plug fits into ANY E20-1 port
Alien: I know that ANY E20-1 plug fits into ANY E20-1 port, but ALL ships use the E20-1 port
Little human: Yeah
Alien: I-i-i still don't understand?
Little human: its standardized.
Thinking about a ship getting an absolute bully for their first human. The kind of human that knows most aliens are afraid of ‘death worlders’, the kind of human that knows where the line is and how far they can go before they get into trouble, and who they can intimidate to let them cross the line as they want.
Part of the crew is like “I knew humans were just as bad as I thought.” Human doesn’t care. Human represents the worst of humanity, but they’re necessary for the ship - they make themselves necessary, and are not afraid to put the rest of the crew at risk if their authority seems challenged.
And then, they get a new human, who is smaller than the first. The first human tries their usual tactics - and the second human breaks their nose. If they were on the ship itself, there’d be consequences, and the first human knows it. But the second human is not afraid to be labeled a troublemaker, and cause trouble for the first, they do. A fierce competition blooms between them, as the second human clearly attempts to muscle in on the first’s territory, despite everyone warning them not to. And as this goes on, the second human befriends the rest of the crew. They’re different than the first. They are kind, they are smart, they are loyal.
They are a death worlder.
During a shipment of endangered animals from another planet, the first human is mauled by the adults. The second human is injured trying to protect them, but to no avail, the first human is killed. Analysis revealed the first human was sprayed with a kind of pheromone that agitates the species - but there was no reason for the pheromone to have been released by the species. Something else is going on, and the captain know it. The second human, despite the clear trauma, accepts the interview.
After the interview ends, the captain turns off the official recording.
“Off the record,” they ask, “what really happened?”
The human swallows, closes their dark eyes.
“They were trying to steal the eggs,” they said. “I saw them - I heard them on a black line with a darkspace distributer.”
“Why didn’t you report it?”
“Not enough time. And I… I had a feeling they’d done it before.”
The captain waits. The human’s closed eyes water.
“You sprayed the pheromone on them,” the captain says.
The human nodded. “They were so busy with the eggs, they didn’t even notice.”
“But,” the captain says, “You tried to save them after.”
The human’s shoulders shake. “I did.” They sob. “I did. I’m sorry. I’m sorry, but I did it. I did it for all of you. I did it for us.”
The human cries.
No charges are filed. The crew would mutiny if their friend were charged with anything, though the captain finds some way to ease the moral strain on both their hands and the second human’s. Another human is brought on board to help with the strain of the first human’s loss. Thy are bright-eyed, clever fingered, sharp-witted, soft-hearted. It takes time to for the wounds caused by the first human - described as a bully by the humans, also ‘a real asshole!’ by the newest recruit - but now that they are gone, they can all recover, and move on.
The moral here? Humans are not always good, but they should never, ever be underestimated - when they claim a pack, they will protect it even from their own kind.
Human: banana
Alien: pardon
Human banana.
Alien: why did you say that randomly?
Human: banana.
Alien: ???
Lmfaoo i tend to say random words when i wake up or when I'm alone
It's fun
10 or 11 little ducks have been spotted crossing the dash board
Bro how can ur content be seen by people
Almost everything i post is in the shadows 🧍
Yippie
Coothin burst into Human Sara's quarters, smacking the light tapper with xis upper left arm as soon as xe entered. "Human Sara! I know you enjoy seeing the new aliens and you are missing this arrival! The other humans are very exci--" "nnnhhggg shhh. Shhh." Human Sara remained in her sleeping-bay, arm pulled over her eyes. "No time for one of your 'naps'!" Xe reached out and tugged gently on Human Sara's arm with two of xis. "The other humans say they look like a cross between 'faeries' and 'jellyfish' and you must see them and also show me photos of those creatures!" Human Sara pulled herself to the edge of the sleeping bay and -- Coothin leapt backward as the human's stomach acid erupted onto the floor. Xe slammed the emergency button on xis communicator. It wasn't xis medical emergency button (unless xe had been splashed and it was even now burning through xis coverings), but xe couldn't reach Human Sara to press hers. The emergency system located xim and started blaring nearby alarms. Human Sara was keening now, an angry, pained moan as she curled into a a ball and clutched her pillow around her head.
Medics arrived equipped for the wrong species, and started to call for other supplies, when another human-who-hadn't-gone-to-the-new-species-docking came out of his room, squinting and covering his mouth like he, too, might eject acid. "Turn it off. Turn it OFF!" he demanded. The medics were already here, and disobeying an angry and insistent human seemed unwise. The alarms were turned off. The human slumped sweatily against his door frame. Those with acute hearing, if they hadn't been deafened by the alarms, could hear groans from elsewhere in the warren of human housing. "A bunch of us have migraines. Please fuck off. quietly. quietly fuck off," he mumbled, having apparently spent himself with his brief shouts. "What caused this? Do we need to quarantine the human sector??" It wouldn't be the first time. New rules had to keep being added about things the humans had to be screened for when returning from planetside.
"mi'en dlar kweshen." Coothin's translator could not parse the human's slurring and transmitted it directly, but the medics had more powerful systems for this sort of scenario. "no kwarteen. debrief la'er. Shhh..." He faded, staggering back into his quarters. ... A handful of medics-of-various-species and a handful of humans who had recovered first sat (or equivalent-ed) around a table. The humans did most of the talking among themselves. "Is there something we all ate?" "I didn't eat breakfast, I woke up too late for [religious seasonal meal, details sent to handheld]," said a woman whose garment extended over the top of her head. A strongly built human rolled his eyes. "Well I didn't eat dinner." He sat up straight, smug. "Intermittent fasting, you know." Several of the other humans rolled their eyes. "Okay, not food. Stress? I know me and Sara are doing some high-stress work, is everyone else's stuff going off the rails?" The alien medics looked at each other. What rails?
But the humans shook their heads. "Hormones? ...Ladies, at least?" More head-shaking. "Any changes to the cleaning chemicals?" They turned to the medics, who were not in charge of the cleaning robots but did have access to which chemicals were being used where. The medics answered in the negative.
"Everyone good on water? Though I dunno why we'd all get dehydrated at once. No atmospheric water emergencies, right?"
Again, something the medics kept track of. Or would find out about quickly as sick crewmates turned up. "No, atmospheric humidity constant. Well, up a little, in some sectors, for the Dre'mls, the new ones? They require higher humidity and less pressure so maintenance spent most of the day running reclaimers on null gasses, the ones that no-one breathes, so needs are still met but the percentages are all --"
"Wait, wait wait wait" -- humans were talking over eachother and the one with the garment banged her palm on the table to shush everyone. "There's been a drop in atmospheric pressure? Over some hours?"
None of the medic species liked the way the humans all had their eyes trained on them. "...yes? The Dre'mls are delicate--"
The humans tossed up their hands, some of them shouting. "Next time just vent it, oh my [human deity]. The sudden drop will make us all miserable for a few minutes, but we handle that going on and off planetside all the time. Don't drop it over HOURS; that means a storm is coming and it'll knock a bunch of us on our ass."
"... oh. That is... unique. It's rare for a species to sense it at all, if it's within survival parameters. If we encounter a species that requires higher pressure, should we --" "I think it matters less, but err on the side of caution and do it fast, yes."
"We will report this to maintenance and add it to the human files. Thank you all for your time; you may go." And it was added to the human files, under "health risks", that causing a fast pressure drop would cause widespread brief pain, but a slow pressure drop would cause concentrated, disabling pain for hours or days. It was also put under the secret "Arguments that species is secretly/unwittingly a hive mind despite denials" file.
you can be peeling a boiled egg and think to yourself wow. that was so simple. and then you peel another one and it’s like being in the throes of war. shell everywhere. egg mangled. tears in your eyes. that’s how god keeps you humble