@keiimyeh

Don’t just accept the new Terms of Service

Tumblr’s at it again, thanks to the new European Privacy Laws. There’s probably nobody who will read this, but it pissed me off so much that I decided to make a post about it. (Ignore the weird language mish-mash, depending on your country the language might differ.)

OK, so many of us get this screen when we try to access our dash:

Realise how the ‘OK’ button is a nice, attention-grabbing blue? If you’re like me, you’re not exactly into reading a 100 pages document and tend to just click it.

My tip? DONT. Instead click on ‘Manage Options’ right next to it:

Now you’ll see this page:

Still pretty harmless, right? That ‘Accept’ button is looking really attractive right now. Instead, click on Verwalten (Probably something like ‘Manage Options’ or something in english) and you’ll get to this page:

Now that’s not too bad, right? I just switched all the buttons to ‘off’, because I’m jealously guarding my personal information and don’t want Tumblr to go off and do who knows what with it. Looks like we’re done! But wait: There’s a SHOW option.

When we click on that one, what we will get is this:

A HUGE list with OVER 300 ENTRIES of companies that can use your data by default if you’d just clicked ‘OK’ on that very first page. Coincidence that this list is hidden that much? Me thinks not. They’re all switched on by default, but I am still a petty bitch that doesn’t want to give out her data, so I switched them all off. All 300+ of them. There is no option to switch them all off at once, and even if you disable all the options above, the companies are still switched on.

(If you wonder how i got that number, I copied the list into excel and looked at the cell number. No way am I actually counting all those entries)

I wonder if humanity will be able to cause an integer overflow or something in the universe's cpu and be able to gain admin priviliges in god's mom's laptop running conway's 11D game of life right after surpassing light speed on a saturday afternoon in which god is eating an overcooked pizza, and the whole problem happening because they still have a 2233 to the power of googolplex bit cpu instead of the 6699 bit to the power of googleplex that everyone else has by now but their mother doesn't really give a shit about a decent computer and so her whole Eden OS laptop will just go kabloom or some shit as humanity takes over it as an advanced neural network after having photoshopped dicks into the desktop's baclground because haha funniey jok amiritr xddxdxdxedxdxd

I wonder what most people would do if someshit like this were to be true

I'd be the one searching for his hentai folder--

or just copying instances of myself to every posible untouched sector of his HDD, erase every metadata linking to my stored files, and just put a harmless low-level innocent file-retrieval forensics program to search around the drive for me and run another process of me at every 2PM when they're having lunch once again

and uh

I guess i'd

put the shooting stars meme or something once that happens because of having accomplished some existentialist dream-?

and put "Git Gud Skrub" on the screen

Unecessarily overdone existential humor ftw amiritr

also diverted from OP's main point a bit but oh well

the universe: okay, you’re a human. I gave you free will and a conscious mind, so you’re free to do whatever you want. So what do you wanna do?

human: GO FAST

the universe: well, you’re a perfect pursuit predator but if that’s the way you want to evolve, go ahead.

human, climbing on a horse: GO FAST

the universe: wait what

human, inventing the carriage, the car and the bullet train: GO FASTER

the universe: I IMPLORE YOU TO STOP

human, trying to figure out lightspeed travel: FAS T ER

A very useful demonstration of the importance of sentence length.

@keiimyeh u//w//u) ♡