I Know There All Lying To Me

Maybe if I was born without a vagina, anal, and breasts I wouldn’t be molested, maybe men wouldn’t sexualize me, maybe male friends wouldn’t try to date me, maybe I wouldn’t be cat called maybe I wouldn’t feel uncomfortable in my own body maybe I would love myself

my ex friend bragged about knowing my address thinking I forgot I knew I just didn’t give a rats ass he not even like that the guy stutters out in public tf I gotta worry for 🧍🏽‍♀️

i require a lot of love and attention to be functional

darkness

darkness isn’t evil darkness is creation and the divine feminine the universe first started in darkness when a baby is in its mothers womb it’s dark :)

stpd culture is getting a prophecy at 10:30am and choosing to ignore it because you have to do this worksheet

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I had a psychotic episode yesterday and the maintenance saw my hell of a room when I was outside now I’m embarrassed

I was hallucinating again the other day and I was so terrified :(

Yesterday on the train I didn’t feel real I felt hallow

Sometimes stpd is shame. Constant shame. Shame so intense it bleeds out from you, into the rest of the world, where no one is to be trusted, not humanity, not anyone you know, not even yourself.

Shame that defies “common reality," where no one is to be trusted because humanity is inherently sinister. Because everyone you know personally is going to watch you through cameras or kidnap you. They're watching you because they've noticed that there is something "off" about you, that you're inept or otherwise incompetent. And thats why they want to hurt you.

Stpd is to exist in two seemingly contradictory states all at the same time- constant anxiety, and constant apathy.

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