Latest Posts by phoenixshadow22 - Page 7

May you find exactly what you want at the thrift shop, in your price range, next time you’re there.

somehow I got 95/20 on an assignment

I hope they never fix it and leave it this way forever

By Jan and Odee

My ADHD brain: you forgot something.

Me: what?

Brain: what?

Remember that post going around that said the sides could be described as coworkers? I’ve got a dumb idea along the same vein: the sides are all roommates and Thomas is their landlord

I’m absolutely embarrassed that I never knew this before but…

The pen stand that most Wacom products come with?

It twists off and has a bunch of nibs in it. I’ve been buying extra nibs when they were in this stupid thing the whole time.

Boomers: All right, which one of you are going to clean up our messes?

Millennials: What? Gen Z: What?

Millennials: Seriously? We have like no power. You ensured that most of us were saddled with crippling debt, and haven’t raised the minimum wage enough to keep up with inflation so we can never pay back that debt, and have barely enough income to share an apartment with one or two roommates. We’re lucky if we can find one with a washer and dryer in-unit within our price range! We’re so tired and over-worked that we barely have enough energy to text a friend or post a selfie on facebook to let people know we’re still alive. How are we supposed to clean up your messes??

Boomers: Whatever. Entitled lazy Millennials. Always on your phone and posting selfies. Maybe if you worked harder you wouldn’t be in debt. Always wanting things handed to you on a platter. It’s not all about you you know. Generation Me amiright?

Millennials: *sigh*

Boomers: All right, how about you, Gen Z? You’re fresh, young, haven’t got much debt yet, you have your whole shining future ahead of you! You can be an inspiration to the world! How are you going to clean up our messes?

Gen Z: Um, we don’t really have any power either. Most of us aren’t even old enough to vote.

Boomers: Don’t put yourselves down! You’re the future! Put your young minds to work! Maybe you’ll think of solutions we’ve never even considered! Let us know what they are and we’ll implement them for you!

Gen Z: Um, ok. Stop destroying the environment by switching to clean energy instead of drilling for oil. Cut your carbon emissions to slow and eventually halt climate change. Raise minimum wage and give people health care so that we survive into adulthood and can help you clean this mess.

Millennials: I mean, these are the things we’ve been trying to tell them for years, but maybe they’ll actually listen to you since you’re the bright shiny future.

Boomers: What? We wouldn’t even consider doing any of that! What do you know about politics, economics, and the environment anyway? You’re not even old enough to vote! Where do you think the money for all these changes is going to come from? Money doesn’t grow on trees.

Gen Z: Tax the rich.

Boomers: What?! The rich worked hard for their money! It’s really hard pleasing your parents so that you can inherit the fortunes! They have a right to hoard away all the wealth so that no one else can have any.

Gen Z: Okay Boomer.

Boomers: WHAT? How dare you insult us! You know, you’d get a lot more respect if you would try and talk to us instead of being so dismissive of everything we say!

Gen Z: *SIGH*

....i love this..i very much love this

Humans are adorable.

Supporting evidence:

1. Humans say ‘ow’, even if they haven’t actually been hurt. It’s just a thing they say when they think they might have been hurt, but aren’t sure yet.

2. Humans collect shiny things and decorate their bodies and nests with them. The shinier the better, although each individual has a unique taste for style and colouring

3. Humans are not an aquatic or even amphibious species, but they flock to bodies of water simply to play in it. They can’t even hold their breath all that long; they just love to splash!

4. When night falls and the sky goes dark, humans become drowsy and begin to cocoon themselves in soft, fluffy bedding.

5. Some humans spend time in each other’s nests! Just for fun! It’s not their nest; they’re just visiting each other.

6. Some humans use pigments and dyes to make their bodies flashy and colourful! They even attach shiny dangly bits to their cartalidgous membranes!

7. Humans are very clever, and sometimes adopt creatures from other species into their family units. They don’t seem to notice the obvious differences, and often raise them alongside their own young!

8. If a human sees another creature in distress, they can commonly be observed trying to help! Even at their own risk, most humans are deeply compassionate creatures!

9. If a human hears a particularity catchy sound or tune, it will often mimic it, even to the point of annoying themselves!

10. Sneezes are entirely involuntary, and completely adorable. Especially when the human in question becomes frustrated

11. Humans love treats!!! Some more than others. Many humans will save these treats specifically for a later date when they are in need of comfort or reassurance. IE, pickles, pop tarts, Popsicles, etc

12. They’re learning to travel in space!!! They can’t get very far, but they’re trying!!! So far, they’ve made it to the end of their yard, and have found rocks

Please aid me in my ability to hand... please

FUCKING HELL HOW DID I?!

HOW DID I MAKE THESE BEAUTIFUL HANDS?!

@wolfieskies25 @theniceprincess-tnp @ihaileysenpai @plushy16 @phoenixmeeka

I love this post

“NO YOU REALLY SHOULDN’T HAVE..” Cat Edition In Six Photos

So...i lost my voice

I love this..like 'exscues me alien did you just assume my ediblilty? How dare you!'

Bad: aliens that insist upon referring to human women as “feeeeemales”.

Good: aliens that insist upon dividing humans into binary categories, but the binary in question is based on something we’d regard as trivial and bizarre.

I...i saw the original stuff in the video...nevrr thought the mutetaded version would cross my dash... much less be the first thimg i see when i open tumbler...

every time i listen to “you’re a mean one mr. grinch” i can’t help but sit there and think “what did the grinch do to hurt you?” because dude just stands there for 2 minutes and 58 seconds and drags the grinch into the dirt

Sanders Sides highschool AU where none of them are related but they all have the same last name so their senior quotes all match up like so:

Logan: No, we’re… Patton: …not related… Roman: …so, please… Virgil: …stop asking.

if ur running a game for a bunch of theater kids who want to roll to seduce every monster and npc: 

if they successfully seduce an npc, have them say “meet me tonight.” they will definitely forget to do this. 

if they remember the meeting, have the npc drop their disguise. the pc is now alone and unarmored in a dark room with a demon. roll initiative.

Why is this my life?

I found a company called “Frantic Meerkat” who makes journals whose sole purpose is to call me out

Happy birthday keith kogane! I can't color as im in theater rehersal at the time this is posted and wont get home till late so enjoy line art

should i post the walmart comic

or should i simply wait

The Great Outdoors

“It’s uh, west. No, east!” “Aren’t you a druid?” “I-I’m dyslexic!”

(source)

I am a(n):

⚪ Male

⚪ Female

🔘 Writer

Looking for

⚪ Boyfriend

⚪ Girlfriend

🔘 An incredibly specific word that I can't remember

high school teachers: if you don’t show up with a dress and full makeup or a fitted tuxedo to class everyday to college your professors will execute you

college professors: 

new favorite meme

meirl

Currently at a choir compation relizing i am indeed mucha screwed choir before us is in a fact mucha good and were infact very mucha a gargbage

Larry, The Legend

(Context: we’re playing Curse of Strahd. One of the random encounters is a crazy dude and five twig blights. Our party of five, myself included, quickly get through most of them…but we’re having a lot of trouble with the last blight… After going an entire round with no one hitting this thing:)

Me: Geez, this thing is badass. We should keep it as our mascot.

Cleric: ….. I try to reason with it.

DM: Uh, okay, what do you say?

Cleric: “Hey little guy, calm down. We won’t hurt you. If you stop, we’ll be friends.”

DM: Roll persuasion.

Cleric: [rolls] ….Uh….low….

Me: I give him advantage.

DM: Okay, what do you say?

Me: “We’ll be great friends! We’ll take you out of here and give you lots of sunlight!” (At the time I didn’t know they were vampiric, lol.)

Cleric: [rolls again] 26!

DM: You see the bush pause, seeming to listen…and then it lashes out at you! [rolls] ….Critting!

(Everyone collectively loses their shit. It’s the sorcerer’s turn.)

Paladin: Wait, wait. Can you delay? I want to try something.

DM: There’s no “delay”, but you can hold an action.

Sorcerer: I hold a firebolt if it attacks.

DM: Alright. Paladin’s turn.

Paladin: Okay, I try to reason with it.

DM: What do you say?

Paladin: I come over to it, and start to pet it. “It’s okay little buddy, we’ll be nice, we promise.”

DM: It attacks you. [rolls] ….Critting again!

Sorcerer: I launch my firebolt. [hits, rolls damage]

Everyone: NO!

DM: The shrub goes up in flame and keels over, motionless.

Me: NO, LARRY!

(There’s a few minute cut here in which we loot the corpse and I, a grave cleric, bury the dead man and try to decide what to do with Larry. Eventually…)

Me: I plant Larry and hope his roots are strong.

Cleric: We can come back later to check on him.

Warlock: We can just take him with us.

Me: OMG yes. Anyone have a pot??

Sorcerer: I have a small chest…

Me: I plant him with some dirt in the chest.

DM: Wow, guys. Wow. Okay.

(We proceed to roll nature checks to figure out what this thing is and how to take care of it. The Paladin rolls high enough to get its full creature block. We now know that it’s vampiric.)

Cleric: I was hurt in the battle, so I drip some of my blood on the plant.

Warlock: I’ll do the same.

DM: [in total disbelief] Okay, both of you take one point of damage for feeding the shrub.

(They happily do so. Much later we encounter a woman on the road to Valaki, the lady who sells dream cakes. The DM forgot about her in the village so he put her here so we can have an interaction. We eventually discover her secrets, beat the crap out of her, and she escapes, leaving her cart behind.)

Me: So it has a hatch and stuff? I want to put dirt in the hatch and plant Larry in it.

DM: …You….You do so…

Me: Sweet!

(Now we have a twig blight we torched and are now attempting to nurse back to health. The DM has since gone to a DM group to ask advice about this development and he’s basically been told to give us Larry. XD I might be back in another week with a Larry update…)

I saw this step-by step tutorial of how to Gird Your Loins and it needed to be readjusted.