putinsactualbigdick

Latest Posts by putinsactualbigdick

Happy birthday to the great molasses flood of 1919

Everytime you watch family related porn or call your partner "daddy or mommy" your just proving Sigmund Freud right and that's just ain't it right that, I ain't taking the L that is Freud winning.

The dad from the wild thornberrys exclames a good "gushing" when ever her stops for a breath while he eats his wife out.

I like to micro dose hyper fixations like having a one night stand with them but those one there *looks to a dark corner with some scurrying creatures inside* they can stay ill macrodose them all the time

THIS ONLY HAPPENS ONCE EVERY FEW YEARS, REBLOG WHILE YOU CAN

if your ghost and your zombie body fall in love postmortem does that qualify as incest or just overly complicated masturbation

The lyrics "she wears short shorts, I wear t-shirts" suggest that she is Mikey Mousing it, while Taylor is over hear Winnie the poohing it. Both of which aren't appropriate for being the cheer captain or in the bleachers

i’m curious. in the tags let me know a media property that lowers your opinion of somebody’s tastes when you find out they enjoy it, not because it’s genuinely harmful but because it sucks. bonus points if you explain why

My friend needs your feedback!! He runs a website [Lingopie] where you can learn a language by watching TV shows and movies.

As a polyglot, he is super passionate about learning and teaching languages and wants to help students and language learners succeed. He has been working on this project 24/7, so your feedback would make his day! Here is the problem:

His website is still young, so they have limited funds to obtain licenses for movies and television shows. To help as many people as possible, he is wondering what languages you would like to learn or have exams for, so he can focus on expanding the media collection for these languages. I really like him and want his project to succeed, so I created a form where you can vote.

The following languages are available at the moment: Japanese 🇯🇵, Korean 🇰🇷, Spanish 🇪🇸, French 🇫🇷, German 🇩🇪, Italian 🇮🇹, Portuguese 🇵🇹 and English 🇺🇸

Which language are you most interested in? Please vote here!

I'm sorry the clogs stay ON during sex

gay as fuck for a guy to be left handed to be honest. why do you need that sort of dexterity? to unbutton other men’s shirts?

Oh do one Y'ALL WANT to post about my url huh, you craving some post about putinsactualbigdick cause no you can't have any go starve from the lack of content I give about his actual big dick, muskrats

had a dream last night that the new tumblr discourse was whether or not people deserved their urls and people were getting callouts and anon hate like "I can't believe you have x in your url when I never see you actually post about them it's pretty messed up that you're taking that url away from other people who actually deserve it :/"

b( . )( . )bඞ

Every once in a while Tumblr just falls over and starts convulsing and its entire user base just kinda. stares at it disapprovingly for a bit.

my username may be putinsactualbigdick but nowadays its all about the putussy y'know

Scene: two friends having a conversation in a living room

Fr1(rob): you know what they don't tell you enough growing up?

*enter random 3rd dude stage left*

Fr3(george) DUDE, FUCK THE PATRIARCHY

Fr2(Dickard) :yeah dude, not even once

In the saying "I'm vaccinated, caffeinated, and freshly masturbated. I'm ready to take today by the balls(consensualy of course)" the phrase brings the question of how long does the 'freshly masturbated' effect last for. It can't be very short with how infrequently people masturbated compared to other things like eating or pissing. So the philosophical question of the day is what counts as freshly masturbated.

Sometimes my mind is *blows bubbles into a glass of milk* and other times it's *stares off into distance waiting for 1 singular thought to occur* could be both at once

could you imagine if there was just like "comedic" commentary from a disembodied voice in porn like two peeps just be fuck'n and you just hear *shlap shlap shlap* they aren't the only thing cumming tonight *shlap shlap shlap* so are many tears as I cry myself to sleep from the crushing loneliness *shlap shlap shlap*

Graduating high school as year 2020 is like

*constant over looming dread that spring break is over next week*

when youve been graduated for like 6 months and going to college for 5

Reblog if you want a shitty summary of your blog in your inbox.

I just remembered for fun as a kid I did the bloody Mary thing for fun

An octopus will become a fleshy if shown tentacle porn and have been proven to be aroused by the tentacle porn after which will try to fuck humans instead of other octopussies

cum is the fifth humor

This generation may be powerful but also like we finna be 69 up in here still using the weird saying of Jared 19 and have people not understand but just say what your 76 and your name ain't even Jared wtf do you mean then in the old folks home you'll hear a chorus of "never fucken learned how to read" but like this entire gen that understands can go off with our weird sayings

Who gave Nick the right to make patrick so thiccccccc

Spiciness is just BDSM diet and you can't tell me otherwise

If it's army green, navy blue, and some people say maroon is Navy red we can then take that trend and say mustard yellow is Navy yellow and what ever the orange and purple colors of army are, are army those since this naming scheme seen to be secondary colors are army and primary colors are navy. Because of this I say the tertiary colors are marine.

What if Medusas pubes where snakes too like she could eat herself out