I

broken windows of missed opportunity timelessly hung in a frame of regret.

I cant stand seeing the old, young, weak, loved, sad, strong, ill, infected, handicapped, unwanted, un noticed, lonely, crushed, disfigured, the religious, meaningless, free, the willing or unwilling captive. the too thin, too thick, too rich too poor, too pretty, too ugly, the just right, the in between, the conscious, the dormant, the used and the users. goldy locks and all the bears. the pigs their wolf, the lines, loops and circles. and then I look in the mirror. I wonder where the hell do I belong? between the lines, out of the details, behind the scenes. the dark side of the moon. somewhere in limbo. just waiting for a green light. waiting for my time. but somethings wrong. I must not have heard the whistle. Was I ready? I was set. and there it goes. Turned around to find lights out, curtain drawn and doors closed.

priceless.

I dont care if you forget my name.

but I want to be worth remembering.

enough heart ache for two.

I feel like this life is so fleeting.

and I worry I wont find a meaning.

before it ends.

The time just keeps slipping by.

Im aging... before my eyes.

I sit and talk with those whom I call friends.

but it never ends, they dont know me.

I dont have one.

but Im waiting.

my friend.

for the day you love me again...

I know it wont come but Ill hold my breath.

Ive been practicing. Ive gotten good at it.

its all just a game that they're playing.

I just wait my turn. keep on waiting.

untill it ends. and its over.

no... second player.

waiting till it ends.

and then maybe...

Ill see you again.

I am an artist.

 I only have one piece. it has no price. it encompasses the entire gamut of emotion. The closer you get, the more you understand its meaning. it can not be recreated or duplicated. I am this piece.

Someplace unfamiliar

with every step. 

I move further from this earth. 

This being ive become. 

clouds once looming over head,  

now just a haze someplace below. 

That place. 

One I never knew and will never know. 

Could never know. 

With every wish Ive held my breath. 

let down. 

Im running out, t 

urning blue as that very color fades from it. 

Those calming words you spoke to me. 

That calming voice, 

bringing sanity. 

as there once was… 

again nothing will be. 

Prolonging pain. 

Inducing change. 

a short glimpse at clarity. 

The night provides the day. 

fire, the beauty of the flame. 

And the ashes, 

the perfect place, 

a clean slate. 

error 404

Theres a part of us thats no longer here,

and one that never was.

but when you feel it,

it makes you ache.

for better or for worse.

Fades each day,

yet never goes away.

The ability to forget...

has been forgotten.

life

Sometimes I get this voice in my head saying. "youre destroying yourself." and the only thing I can think is. I know.

ingrained

... I truly am haunted. Sadly there is no exorcism for the memory.

the eeg shell.

Ill grit my teeth and bare your pain.

but you wont remember me.

all I was, this life, my tragedy.

a delicate balance, definition of fragility.

though planted feet I loose stability.

its hard to breath drowned in humility.

all the words I took for granted.

Even while trying I cant imagine.

I just want to say Im sorry.