Funeral, Right

Have y'all ever thought about Bill's size? Like actually?

He's like what, a foot and a half tall? Which sounds tiny until you realize that's over twice times the size of your head. His eyeball would be like the size of a fist!

He's massive! It would be utterly horrifying to see this guy in front of you. How the hell did Ford not realize he was a demon??

this is so canon, i would know

Mabel and Bill were sitting on the couch when Soos passed from the gift shop through the living room. As Soos passed, Bill was saying, "No, I just don't see relationships as eternal. Romance is a short term commitment. Like a fashion trend, or, or—"

"Like gum?"

Bill snapped his fingers. "Yes! Exactly like gum!"

As he headed upstairs, Soos heard Mabel say, "So when a romance starts to lose its flavor, you just—" and Bill cut in, "You spit it on the sidewalk, grind it under your heel, and float away without looking back, never thinking about it again..."

A few minutes later, after changing out of his Mr. Mystery suit into a more comfortable question mark t-shirt, Soos headed back downstairs. Bill was still talking: "... and all you get out of it is sickly sweet spit, you're just—swallowing all this sweet spit until it makes your mouth sour and it's dripping out around your eye, and it makes you hungrier than if you'd never eaten at all, and all your friends say 'oh Bill, you're always griping about your gum, why don't you settle down to eat a proper meal,' and you say 'how about you mind your own business, Kryptos, I don't lecture you about your diet,' and then your other friends accuse you of choosing inedible snacks so you don't have to commit to swallowing them, because they don't get that you're a flawless energy being, you don't need 'nutrition' or 'sustenance,' this is just a hobby to you—and then you just, you get sick of the taste of gum altogether, you never want to chew gum again as long as you live, it's always so needy and your jaw hurts, and it's your fault if you can't focus on chewing the stupid thing all day every day, like maybe you have a life of your own, did anyone consider that? So you burn down a gum factory so you don't have to look at their stupid ads! And then an eon later you find yourself craving a stick of gum, so you find a different brand and cram a new one in."

Mabel, who'd been listening to Bill's monologue in wide-eyed stunned silence, finally smiled in relief as he landed on a familiar sentiment. She pumped her fist in the air. "Yeah! Cram a new one in!"

"You get me, kid."

I think there might be something wrong with Bill.

they want each other soooo bad

Also Solar isnt a Hazbin Hotel OC but lowkey hed fit in

Bill and Wheatley won in my heart 💔

i made this because im upset

nobody asked me my headcanons on Bill's weird alien shape gender but that's only because you didn't know you wanted to know

of course he has gold bricks and pronouns

developing an au! not much is different other than what’s said but yayyy - calling this the Nightmares Au for now

comm info under the cut!

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COMMS OPEN jack(et)

HI!!! ADDING ONTO THIS - i haven’t gotten any commissions yet and currently my household does not have an income. This would help a ton! if

I am so spiteful that Bill and Wheatley lost to Reigen and Nagito so eat this shitpost i made to make myself feel better 😭

AAAHSHAHDHAGSHAH HIHIIIII HIHIHIHHIHIIIIIIII :3 GIIHHIHHIHIHHIIIIIHIHIHIII *WAVES EXCITEDLY LIKE A CHILD* HIIIIIHOHIHIIHOOOOHOHIFIDJDJSJ /E WAVE

Nightmare Bill but human or smt idk

About a week ago I posted this.

I’ve been getting horrible messages like this in my ask for months, including:

and my personal favorite

After getting the message saying “Just go kill yourself” I was completely done dealing with this person’s horrible messages and replied with just an “Okay.” and logged off tumblr.

About a week later I logged back on with 17 messages in my ask, most of them from the anon. I scrolled down and at first when I logged off, the anon messaged me things like

I scrolled up more and all of a sudden they started sending me more and more messages like

This was extremely surprising to me. I thought “After all those horrible messages you sent to me for MONTHS about hating me and wanting me dead, you say ‘sorry’ and that you ‘cant be responsible for someone’s suicide’?”

But I guess the lesson goes like this:

DONT TELL ANYONE TO KILL THEMSELVES UNLESS YOU ARE PREPARED FOR WHAT MIGHT ACTUALLY HAPPEN

HI BILL! *I bow down before him* my king~ may I have a hug and a kiss please? I'll make a deal with you! My soul to you in return for a hug and kiss! (and maybe be with you forever~)

HAHAHA! HEY THERE, YA LOVESICK MEATSACK! YOU CERTAINLY ARE DESPERATE FOR A LITTLE LOVIN', ARENTCHA? SACRIFICING YOUR PRECIOUS SOUL JUST FOR LIL' OL' ME? WELL, IM FLATTERED! JUST SHAKE MY HAND, I'LL GIVE YOU ALL THE LOVIN' YOU WANT AND THEN SOME! ALL FOR THE LOW, LOW PRICE OF YOUR LITTLE MEAT SUIT! HOW'S THAT SOUND, KID?