Eventually-getting-it-together - I'm Doing My Best...ish

School has been a bit chaotic. I had to take a couple days off to recover from the first dose of the vaccine (I'm notoriously bad about shots). While I'm so incredibly grateful that I could get it, I was knocked out for 2 whole days and am behind.

72 hours of chaos:

●read a chapter + notes + watched necessary videos and presentations

●graphic organizer activity for this (past) week (mind map with bubbl.us or whatever that took too long)

●discussion readings + post + reply

●19 page assignment

●"long term assignment" that was a 4-5 page essay in response to an article that I did within 12 hours

●170 minutes of stats videos + notes

●initial contribution for stats group project

●lots of essay revising for a comp class + submission

●reading this week's essay for comp class and prepared notes

●shoveling my corner house and my grandma's house *twice*

I wish I could say that tomorrow is going to be better, but it's not :/

My region is currently being pummeled by a snow storm and I'm going to have to get up early early to shovel 7-12 inches of snow before my online comp class and another grueling day of online learning while my grandma is currently dying alone in a hospital with a positive covid test along with many other health issues

~It's fine. Everything is fine~

Today and yesterday were school-free days. I got my first dose yesterday morning (!) But I ended up having a shitty reaction. I had a headache, low grade fever, aches + chills, fatigue, and a little dizziness. I'm better now and that's honestly how I respond to a majority of vaccines. I just took a couple days off to relax too. I'm so relieved I got that first dose though. I'm literally so glad.

Happy leaf sweeper

(via)

Definetly not my most productive day. I'm proud of what I got done, but it just wasn't nearly what I needed to do. I'm still bumbed out from yesterday. I'm actually behind schedule this week (not just because I joined a class late). On Wednesday I was too depressed to do any schoolwork and slept and watched videos most of the day. Today I couldn't get focused until about 11am. I woke up somewhat early, but I definetly slept in compared to my schedule last year/pre covid.

What I did today:

● wrote two initial discussion posts (~700 words total)

● replied to a discussion post (another ~300 words)

● got half way through this week's Environmental Statistics module

● attempted to do some affirmations in the mirror today (I have horrible self esteem and body image... it's been particularly bad lately)

With that I'm going to listen to some Headspace and go to bed 😴😴😴

If there's a loving, caring, and stable adult who wants to take in a child... why are you trashing this????? Is this a cultural thing????? I don't understand this. I knew one girl who was from Bolivia and her white parents adopted her and they kept her in soccer, threw her a lavish quinceanera, and kept her in other culturally appropriate things. These were the whitest people I've ever met, yet they did a wonderful job raising Hannah. It's possible to be culturally aware of how you are raising an adoptive child... idk why that's even a debate. Educate yourself. A great example is hair maintenance classes for white parents who adopt a little black girl. Her confidence is boosted by walking into whatever life throws at her if adults help her navigate her hair. I don't get why that's a problem. The list goes on. Disappointed that there's shade being thrown anywhere.

White couples that adopt non-white kids

(via)

Today was crunch day and was finished off with the first anxiety attack of the semester... heheh so much for a less stressful semester

Unfortunately, I actually studied a lot more than what is displayed (just didn't start the app). I'm incredibly stressed out. I'm not a writer by any means. Some people have math anxiety, but I swear I have essay anxiety. I had to write an "essay by example"... but that doesn't make sense to me. It was very unclear what was meant by "essay by example" so I tried a persuasive essay that highlighted individual examples to refute a really dumb prompt. Idk. I missed the first 1.5 weeks of the class and feel lost. She wouldn't extend the first draft due date for me by even a few hours. I turned in the most garbage essay of my life. I feel like I did the entire assignment wrong.

What I did today:

● finished the other half of a stats module

● made an initial discussion post

● replied to 2 discussion threads

● took a walk in nature with one of my doggos and my sister

● oriented myself for the composition class I joined late (syllabus, directions, assignments, expectations)

● read a couple example essays / instruction in the textbook I finally got

● wrote a 4 page essay that is absolute garbage

● anxiety attack

I have no idea how I got a 5 on the AP Econ Marcoeconomics exam junior year of high school. I'm looking at your notes and recognized I once crammed this knowledge in, but it's now gibberish.

back with economics!!

This semester needs to end 😫😢😓