All Right Mirror Me, Roll Perception

The average human body contains enough bones to make an entire skeleton

Promise?

This

nothing brings me more joy than repeatedly doing a bit that my mother dislikes

I didn’t ask “what?” because I didn’t hear you, my brain still runs on internet explorer and the information hasn’t loaded yet

I also have the need to entertain you and will constantly ask if you want anything if you come to my home because “being a good host” was drilled into me from birth

Every day when I drive back from my college campus I see this sign that says “Bike Stripers” and every day I get super excited about the idea of seeing hot girls stripping on motercycles before I realize it’s an auto shop. Every day. My brain forgets every day that it’s an advertisement for the auto shop. Apparently I’ve got a thing for hot girls on motercycles. And apparently it causes my brain to short-circuit for a couple seconds.

New hot take:

River Song is Miss Frizzle

Prove me wrong, I dare you.

This reminds me of the time my old roommate asked me to cut an apple for the dish he was making and the absolute, utter disappointment in his eyes when he looked over and saw me cutting it with a fillet knife.

He did most of the cooking after that because apparently I “couldn’t be trusted with basic tasks” or whatever.

Now this is a beauty pageant I would watch!

Petition to add a “guns and horses and body paint” category to Miss Universe

Miss Guanajuato’s traditional outfit for Miss Mexico 2020 (source)