“It Should Be Easier Once We Get Rid Of The Pile Of Noses...”

“Isn’t he the spoon God?”

-Somebody who probably just discovered a new religion

“Why does February have, like, no days??”

-Someone I used to think was smart

"God is a pop culture icon."

“It’s not porn, one of them is on fire!”

"We called him sparky because he looked like a horse!"

They are now talking about wearing his friend

Convesation between my mum and brother

Brother: He was in the way so we killed him

Mum: You killed your friend in his sleep?

B: It gets worse…

M: …

B: …

M: …

B: We skinned him.

M: …

B: We needed the leather!

"We need more queer pyromaniacs around here!"

“You’re the kind of person who invades a medieval castle in the winter.”

-My brother

"Maybe they're hoping the cow is in the market for a sugar daddy"

“Your homework is to pee in a jar for a week...”

-My science teacher