FIRST DAY AT WORK TIPS

The sound of heavy rain while you are in bed.

Princess Tips

No matter what you look like, genuine kindness and good thoughts will shine through your face and make it look soft and beautiful

Rub a little moisturizer onto your cheekbones each morning to make your skin glow 

Use pink eyeshadow during the day for an angelic look and gold eyeshadow for royal evening events

Dress in clothes that fit well and make you feel good. Make sure you wash them on the proper settings so they don’t fade or shrink and cut away loose threads 

Practice good posture! You can’t look regal with your shoulders hunched or your head down (your imaginary tiara will fall off)

Speaking of tiaras, you can replicate this look on a daily basis by putting in a sparkly hair clip or two

Always be kind and compassionate to animals and children- even consider volunteering

You don’t need a lot of possessions to be royal, you just need to take care of what you have (go for quality over quantity when it comes to home decor and clothes)

Practice your hobbies and skills to be sophisticated and classy

Study hard in school since princesses are always well educated

Sing or dance around a little while doing boring household chores

Be polite to people but also know your worth with a quiet dignity and don’t tolerate being treated badly

Remember you’re a princess no matter what!

“The only thing we can bring with us to heaven, is other people.”

— something I heard at church today that hit my heart right where it needed to (via @lovechangeseverythang)

Life tips?

I’ll answer this question by echoing notes I’ve left for myself in my journal:

Eyes on the prize while you stop to smell the roses

You are loved, even when you don’t feel like it and even when those that love you don’t do it in the most efficient ways

Try not to take shit personally, everyone is just projecting

The success you’re looking for is in the work you’re avoiding

If he isn’t in awe of you, he doesn’t deserve you

Outgrow feeling like you have to play small to protect peoples feelings

The pain of self-discipline is better than the pain of regret

If you allow a man to feed you he has the power to starve you—be independent and have your own income and assets

If God puts rice in your basket, there is no point in wishing for soup—instead of wallowing in self-pity, make the most of your situation and excel

Fashion is for your everyday life, not just for big occasions

Your brain changes more in your twenties than at any other time in your adult life—whatever it is that you want to change about yourself, now is the time to do it by building good habits

Speed is relatively unimportant, forward is forward

Low self-esteem often leads to adverse self-fulfilling prophecies; break the cycle and build a strong sense of self-worth

The people who reach the greatest heights are not always the strongest, nor the most intelligent; they are the most responsive to change

Some of these are truisms I’ve found on Tumblr, some are quotes from books I’ve read, some are wisdom I’ve received from the people in my life, and others are things I’ve realized from self-reflection. This probably wasn’t the most organized but I hope it was still helpful! ❣️

Fuck your dreams!

- or at least revise them from time to time...

So a few months ago my boyfriend (who is really fond of TED Talks) told me about one of the talks he listened to recently. The message was supposed to be "F**k your dreams!". I've got to be honest with you, I simply did not agree with him.

Well, about two weeks ago one of my few loved family members died and before I even could cry about it or realize what kind of loss that meant for me, something inside of me demanded change. Change concerning my dreams. And that was really a strange thought because I have been working so hard towards becoming a PI, having my own chair in some microbiological discipline, that it basically left me with nothing else.

Now, it has been some time since this initial spark. I did a lot of crying, thinking, reading and blankly staring into my computer - not really able to articulate what was going on inside of me. But this thought had stuck in my head because after all I felt like I've been saying "Sorry, I am busy" way too much over the past years. And I might have just discovered that my time, my boyfriend's time, my friend's time and sadly also my family's time on earth is limited. Everyone's time is limited. Somehow it felt like I forgot to use it the right way.

Still, not knowing how to communicate any of these thoughts, I straight out asked my boyfriend what he thought would happen if I just started all over and started a degree in engineering. And he said: "Well, then you'll become an engineer." The answer was so simple that it made me laugh because something within me expected him to talk me out of it, to give me a passionate speech about following my dreams and not have one through back make me quit. But he obviously asked for reasons and we talked them over. In the end he gave me a passionate speech - my own personal TED Talk on how I am not obligated to my old dreams and that I can revise them anytime I want to. And that's when I understood what the talk was about to say. (I am actually not sure if this one is the talk he got the idea from & my personal one was more inspiring to me but this one will do for you.)

I thought it would get harder to express my thoughts to other people. Especially, because I am still trying to figure out what I want to do instead. Engineering was just the first thing I could think of. But actually, nobody tried to talk me out of it. People asked questions. Obviously. Because suddenly I wasn't this stubborn fighter anymore who would do anything to become a well-known scientist. But they meant well & just tried to understand. And they did understand. Even my mom was full on in telling me that there are so many things I am interested in and that I am talented in that I would surely find my way. No word about finishing what I started. No word about how much longer I would want to study. Or if at some point I was going to earn my own money. (I am very much planning on it though.)

So, I guess, what I want to say is: If you ever find yourself doubting your dreams, don't be shy to revise them and take your time. And never be afraid to communicate it - you might find support where you never expected it to be.

24 Women Who Changed Science. And The World.

Purchase here!

Habits of successful students

Discipline: “discipline is doing what needs to be done, even when you don’t want to”, which means that you have to force yourself to start doing things. 

Concentration: when you make a real effort in your work (study, homeworks etc…) you will be more likely to actually focus, understand and learn. 

Organization: always set tasks and goals and organize a study-schedule. Maybe you don’t really want to plan all the week, but if you just wake up and open your agenda/bullet journal/iphone calendar and write down all the things you have to do, setting due dates and deadlines, you’ll feel more conscious and encouraged to stay on track. 

Tasks-splitting: sometimes, you write down your tasks. Some of these tasks may be very hard and complicated, and it will take a long long time to complete them. So, you can split them in smaller tasks, so you will feel satisfied after a shorter period of time, instead of studying for hours and still seeing that chapter undone on your study-schedule. 

Watch the sunrise: when I wake up late, I feel like I don’t have enought time to do my work and lose my motivation. I literally panic and then I think “whatever, I could not complete all the things anyway”. So, if you wake up earlier you will feel more positive and  controlled. 

Smart reading: try not to read your textbook just like a newspaper. For every paragraph you read, try to underline and write down key words and then your question about that subject. Literally, turn your textbook into questions. If you write down question - particularly why…? - and think about the answer, you will be more likely to remember that stuff later. 

Healthy lifestile: if you don’t drink enough water in the morning, you will be more likely to have a decrease of concentration in the afternoon/evening, so: stay hydrated. Try also to have some snaks every one-two hours: feed your brain. 

notes to self *new information edition*

🌼 Human life is filled with its little miseries. The little irritations of human life. I don't know the exact translation, but Van Gogh, in his letters to his brother, kept saying 'misères de la vie humain'. And he said it as such a factual thing. Like 'oh, that's just the little miseries of our human life. What are yours lately?'

It left me so stunned. That sort of acceptance? It's golden. Currently my misères de la vie humain are job hunting and not thinking about how the world is increasingly becoming dystopic.

🌼 This desire for slow, mindful living, the rejection of a fast-paced hustle culture driven life where we glorify being burned out and busy all the time - it's not stupid. Read this passage by the writer Jeff Brown where he speaks about when we are not centered, it's easy to be manipulated and targeted by others including capitalism. To force yourself to align your goals with those of others. Because you don't know your authentic self. You don't know what you want.

But you have to focus on noticing everything - from your breath, to your body, to your inner self. And you have to centre yourself. He says it may be counter intuitive but actually the slower you move, the faster you will return home. And that just validated what I've known and felt all along.

🌼 Saw this reel on Instagram that revealed the best advice for overthinkers. It said, when you're overthinking: write. When you're underthinking: read. When you're confused: do both.

How has something so simple yet profound not found its way to me before? I hated the word overthinker because as a teenager everyone used that against me. But then one day this random girl from my class said it's not that you overthink, it's just that your standard level of thinking is already so high from the others that to them it's beyond their normal processing capacity. I wish she is doing well right now.

🌼 Hearing some hypocritical people talk about boundaries in their distorted victim blaming narrative, I realized that bro you need to communicate a boundary when you want to set it. Like if you've known someone for 10 years and suddenly you want to change something about your relationship and you decide to set a boundary that demands that change - then you can't just set it in your mind and not communicate it to the other person. And you certainly cannot get mad when they cross a boundary they didn't even know exists now suddenly.

People are increasingly misusing popular narratives surrounding mental health and well being to justify their shitty behaviour. And it's just fucked up.

🌼 To end on a lighter note, I just learned tonight how to say 'my hobby is reading' in Korean and it makes me very happy. I can finally understand sentence formation and structure better and am confident to carry on.

quotes that help me survive:

“You are not lost. You are here. Stop abandoning yourself. Stop repeating this myth about love and success that will land in your lap or evade you forever. Build a humble, flawed life from the rubble, and cherish that. There is nothing more glorious on the face of the earth than someone who refuses to give up, who refuses to give in to their most self-hating, discouraged, disillusioned self, and instead learns, slowly and painfully, how to relish the feeling of building a hut in middle of the suffocating dust.” — Heather Havrilesky, Ask Polly

this tumblr text post:

“To live in this world you must be able to do three things: to love what is mortal; to hold it against your bones knowing your own life depends on it; and, when the time comes to let it go, to let it go.” — Mary Oliver

From an interview with Kazu Makino:

Instructions On Not Giving Up, Ada Limon:

And this poster by Yumi Sakugawa

“You have to believe, in your heart, that even if you don’t work hard and exercise and think positive thoughts and make new friends and march triumphantly into the future, you are still enough. You will always have bad days. Being broken doesn’t make you a loser. You can crumble, and you will still be enough. Make that your religion moving forward. You are here to feel this moment. You are not here to become someone better. You are not here to impress or compete. You are not here to prove yourself. You are here to savor this life. Let down your guard. You are already enough. Believe it.” — Heather Havrilesky

“The first feminist gesture is to say: “Ok. They’re looking at me. But I’m looking at them.” The act of deciding to look, of deciding that the world is not defined by how people see me, but by how I see them.” -Agnès Varda

lyrics from the song Grow by The Oh Hellos:

“The world’s otherness is antidote to confusion, that standing within this otherness—the beauty and the mystery of the world, out in the fields or deep inside books—can re-dignify the worst-stung heart.” — Mary Oliver

“I hope you will go out and let stories, that is life, happen to you,and that you will work with these stories from your life--not someone else's life--water them with your blood and tears and your laughter till they bloom, till you yourself burst into bloom. That is the work. The only work.” — Clarissa Pinkola Estes