It Gets Better - Blog Posts

First self portrait I’ve done in a while, wanted to do something more expressive

please

It's June again so this is your reminder that Pride is for...

People who are out and open

Those who aren't out yet (or ever)

Folks who can't be out right now for their safety

People still figuring this whole thing out

Someone trying out a new label or identity for the first time

Folks in various stages of transition or transformation

Those who came before, who made things better for us now

The generations after us, who inspire us to keep making things better

We see you, you're valid, and Pride is for you too. <3

"You are still here. And that is everything." 💚

From Matt Haig - The Comfort Book

alternative depression tips for when you read the ‘depression tips’ post and laugh hollowly, bc only in your fondest dreams could you manage to do any of those things

dry shampoo and face wipes are your friend. if you can brush your teeth you’ll feel maybe 2% less disgusting. wash your hands.

smelling nice is gr9, rubbing moisturiser in is Exhausting. perfume, scented candles and linen sprays are way quicker.

try to change your clothes at least every other day. wear sweats or pjs as often as you physically can.

you don’t need to put on underwear if you’re not leaving the house (that goes double for bras and binders)

drink any water that hasn’t been sitting out on your desk for a week. dust doesn’t taste good. stay hydrated. I fill one of those 2 litre bottles in the morning and keep it with me so I don’t have to get up and walk to the sink.

re: cleaning, try and keep one room vaguely clean. if everywhere else is a shit hole that’s fine, but you can go sit in your one tidy space and chill for a bit. it’s fine if that’s the bathroom or just the corner of your bedroom where there’s no crap on the floor. find a tiny space that isn’t horrifying and sit in it.

music helps.

eat a thing. +5 points if it has a fresh fruit or vegetable in it. take out is acceptable if it comes with veggies.

if your creativity curled up and died a long time ago try and find something that at least reminds you what it was like to feel inspired. watch a film, look at some art (probably not your own), read a thing. if that makes you feel worse, just?? don’t think about it??

grounding yourself is actually really helpful. open the window and breathe for 2 minutes. lay down on the floor and feel your whole body (unless you don’t want to in which case: lay down and don’t feel anything except the floor) 

human interaction is Good. text a family member you don’t hate if you have one. message a friend. reply to someone’s personal post with ‘SAME’. make your own personal post asking the void for validation. stare out the window at people and remind yourself that life exists outside of the black space inside your head. whatever works.

pets are amazing, agreed. watch some funny animal vines if you don’t have one.

Update on me 😊

So I've been on my anti anxiety meds for four months now and I must say..... I feel so much better now. My anxiety is still there which sucks but am able to shut it up easier now. I also stopped googling symptoms which is a huge thing and I don't ask for reinsurance that much anymore but sometimes when I get scared and Jeff decides to be a dick ( Jeff by the way is what I call my anxiety lmao) I ask but only once or twice. I also don't freak out about every little sensations i have!!!!! if I get a headache, I'm not terrified of it. Even though there has been good things, my anxiety is still there which means I still have some of my stuff still. But what really matters is that am learning how not to let it affect me anymore and I'm learning how to fight because im gonna be honest, its never gonna go away, but if I can get it to be not so loud, that's what matters. 

Unchaperoned Thoughts #1

I have been thinking lately about what I want out of my life. Everything feels stagnant, but the only constant is me. I am the one who is holding me back. I am the one who hesitates on making the first move. I don’k know why, I just do. I know it doesn't make me happy, but I've been doing it so long its hard being social again.

I need to start trusting the fact that I am a likeable person and I deserve to be loved and be surrounded by people who appreciate me for who I am. Surround myself with people who challenge me to grow and change for the better. It doesn’t matter that some people won’t like me or find me a bit weird, because they won’t be staying in my life and that’s fine.

So here’s my first challenge:  Find 3 people outside the people you know that you vibe with and accept you for you. There is no time limit take your time and try not to stress yourself out. It’ll be fine.x

A special shoutout to LGBTQ+ Mormons and exmos this pride; to you in the closet, sitting awkwardly in sacrament meeting, finding excuses to duck out of homophobic Sunday school lessons, you, wearing a rainbow pin to girl's camp, you out and proud and still attending, enduring side eye from sisters and comments to "maybe tone it down" from your bishop. You, afraid to bring your partner home, you who's only Mormon on Sundays but can't bear to let your parents down (earthly and heavenly). To you who took the bravest step and left the church and your community, and feel like you'll never find a new one. To you who hears "no way you were a mormon!" but are still unravelling the trauma of purity culture.

I see you.

I love you.

It gets better.