Scatterpatter's Incorrect Quotes Generator - Blog Posts

This ship needs more love

Lucius: Sorry it took me so long to bail you out of jail.

Barty:No it's my fault, I shouldn't have used my one phone call to prank the police.

Hades sees dead people

Hades: Goodnight moon.

Hades: Goodnight tree.

Hades: Goodnight ghosts that only I can see.

Dionysus: On a scale from "Damn Daniel" to "Fre sha vaca do", how are you feeling?

Apollo: In between "It's an avocado thanks" and "How did you defeat Captain America", but as a solid answer probably "I don't need a degree to be a clothing hanger". How about you Hermes?

Hermes: Probably "Road work ahead".

Artemis: I speak many languages, and this is none of them.

Hermes:My life isn't as glamorous as my wanted poster makes it look like

Who broke it?

*Everyone is standing around a broken coffee maker*

Ares:So? Who broke it? I'm not mad, I just want to know.

Athena:I did... I broke it.

Ares:No. No you didn't. Hermes?

Hermes:Don't look at me. Look at Artemis.

Artemis:What? I didn't break it.

Hermes: Huh. That's weird. How did you even know it was broken?

Artemis: Because it's sitting right in front of us, and it's broken!

Hermes: Suspicious.

Artemis:No it's not!

Dionysus: If it matters... Probably not...Apollo was the last one to use it.

Apollo: Liar I don't even drink that crap!

Dionysus:Oh really? What were you doing by the Coffee cart earlier?

Apollo:I use the wooden stirrers to push back my cuticles. Everyone knows that Dionysus!

Athena:Okay, let's not fight. I broke it, let me pay for it Ares.

Ares:No! Who broke it?

Dionysus:Ares? Artemis has been awfully quiet.

Artemis:Really?

*Everyone starts arguing*

Ares being interviewed: I broke it. It burned my hand earlier, so I punched it.

Ares:I predict ten minutes from now they will be at each other's throats with warpaint and a pig head on a stick.

Ares:

Ares: Good. It was getting a little chummy around here.

Store Worker: Would a Mr. Apollo come to the front desk?

Apollo:Hello, is there a problem?

Store Worker:*points to Hermes and Dionysus*

Store Worker: I believe they are with you?

Hermes and Dionysus:We got lost.

Apollo:I didn't even bring you two with me!

I decided to muck around on the Incorrect Quotes Generator, and Here's what came out (Shadowhunter version)

(Website Link) Simon: What’s up guys? I’m back. Jace: What the- you can’t be here. You’re dead. I literally saw you die. Simon: Death is a social construct. Magnus: Man, I only ever see you awake, do you ever shut down or stop running? Alec: Oh, I’m always running Alec: The question is from what Clary: Jace and I were crossing the street, and this dude drove by and honked at us Simon: *Sighing* What did Jace do? Clary: He chased him to the next red light, then reached into his window and... Jace: Who wants a steering wheel? *The squad right before Alec's wedding* Magnus: Well I have to go, I have a wedding to attend. Issy: Wait... Oh! I have a wedding to attend too! Clary: Oh, I have a wedding to attend as well Simon: I THINK WE ALL HAVE WEDDINGS TO ATTEND Jace, panicked: I THINK I HAVE A WEDDING TO OFFICIATE Clary: Can you keep a secret? Alec: Do you know anything about my life? Clary: No I do not. Good point. Alec: Jail is no fun. I’ll tell you that much. Magnus: Oh, you’ve been? Alec: Once. In Monopoly. Jace: Do you ever want to talk about your emotions, Alec? Alec: … No. Issy: I do! Jace: I know, Issy. Issy: I’m sad! Jace: I know, Issy. Simon: You saved me. I owe you my life. Raphael: No thanks. I’ve seen it and I’m not very impressed. Clary: Alec isn’t answering their phone Magnus: I’ll call Simon: Clary and I have both tried six times each, what makes you thi- Alec: Hello? I had to change the names around for them to make sense so many times lmao