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Damian writes a letter to Talia:
Dear Mother,
I am writing in the hopes that you can offer advice on how to avoid your mistakes. I'm afraid I seem to have inherited your taste in men.
His name is Danny, and I believe he is a meta, as when researching him I saw him break a steel beam with his bare hands, and reach through a closed fridge to grab a snack. Regardless of this power, and the restraint he must have in keeping it hidden, he is absolutely appalling at the basic chores of living as a human.
Mother, yesterday he asked me if you could put tinfoil in a microwave, because he heard that can be dangerous but "you can microwave cup noodles and the lid on them is basically tin foil" and I had to resist the urge to proclaim my love for him.
Todd refuses to put me out of my misery, and I am afraid if this continues I will be proposing marriage by year's end.
Please send help, your loyal son.
Damian being moronsexual and getting a crush on Danny Fenton against his will. Danny does something so fucking idiotic and he goes to Jason and says, “I have taken after my mother. Todd, as the only reasonable man in this family, it is now your duty to put me out of my misery.” And Jason’s all, “you had your chance the first time I shot you.”