𐙚Damian Wayne is my son any hate towards him will not be tolerated𐙚mainly here for posting batfamm content nd my oc ִֶָ🦇་༘࿐ִֶָ. ..
15 posts
In the many rare days of Jason visiting the manor, he pops in and out. One time Duke wanted to go get an errand, so Jason offered to lend a ride.. After errand, Jason goes "Hey kid how bout I teach you how to drive?" Duke: I'm underage man that didn't help, so duke was driving either way, back to the manor a cop pulls up Duke: Oh! Cops! switch. switch. jason: why are you panicking? Duke: Gotham cop sees a black dude driving a white dude's car without no license? I'm gonna be a hashtag by sundown he gets out his phone and leaves it out Jason: The hell you are doing? Duke: I'm not reaching in my pocket in front of a cop, thats the leading cause of death amongst African-american men the cop gets out, duke sees its a black cop from the window Duke: Hold up, wait- Yes! its a black cop jason: Its an emotional roller coaster with you Cop shows up, saying "You've been circling this parking lot for almost an hour, can i see your license?" duke: listen here bruh, i aint got that right now. You know how it is man cop: i aint even trippin' man Jason: Look officer i'm just teaching the kid how to drive cop: then im gonna need to see your license and registiration jason gives his license cop: your license expired 4 months ago jason: ..i'll make a call and get it renewed cop: No your over the age of 20 so you have to go to the DMV and take a driving test he says as he is writing a ticket Jason: what?? cop: and im confiscating your license jason: what?! cop: and im giving you this ticket jason: 250$ dollars?! cop: if you prefer i can impound your car duke: hey let him take the car man its cheaper than the ticket
Damian IS the best robin and deserves all love and attention, yall gotta learn that being a child prodigy assassin is HARSH 😔😔😔🙏🙏
Damian Wayne is the best Robin. Fight with the wall.
DC Secret santa 2024 gift for @deven895 :33
Jason: there is NOTHING I can’t do-
Tim: Kill the joker
Jason: YOURE A PIECE OF SHIT
tim: JUST SAY YOU CANT DO IT
Jason: I WONT
tim: You won’t say you can’t do it?!
*jason pulls out gun*
Jason: FUCK YOU TIM
Tim: FUCK YOU
*fight ensues w Jason throwing his gun in the floor and throwing hands w tim*
Damian, has a bruised knee goes to Dick for "assistance": "Grayson, I have faallen off my scooter and require assistance" Dick: "Dami look at your knee it's bleeding"
Damian: "The pavement was the victim, I am the victor" Dick: "That's a pretty bad boo boo, just wait right here let me go get something okay"
Damian: "Bandage me in silk and I shall ride again!" Dick, now with bandages: "Ok, we have to clean it first" Damian: "whats that" dick: "hydrogen proxide it'll disinfect it"
damian: "dose it hurt"
dick: "no it won't hurt" damian: "promise?" dick: "okay a little" *dose the thingy* damian: *intensified screams* dick: "sorry i have to do this-" damian: "THE HORNETS OF HADES HATH DESCENDED UPON ME" Dick: "i had to dami"
damian: "i have smelted iron with titan's touch, and forged swords with chimeras flames!"
dick: "oh god" damian: "but never felt the basilik's sting like this!"
dick: "stings a little bit but it's not that bad" damian: "lay two tokens on my eyes for the ferrymen"
dick: "damian-"
damian: "im fading to elysium..i see pennyworth"
dick: "you just had to bring up alfred"
damian: "HE LOOKS BEAUTIFUL" Dick: "damian your being a little too dramatic."
Damian: "I.AM.THE DRAMA."
Dick: "do you want superman bandaid or batman bandaid" damian: "batman bandaid please."
Babs: Depends on why you want to punch the kid- Looks at Damian Babs: What did little demon junior do this time
Steph, looking at Damian: Babs, would it be wrong to punch a child?
i just sniffed something.. AMAZING ART??!?!?!??!
raven and starfire
Dinner Damian: "Drake, do you want me to Jump across this table? Because I don't have all day for this okay?!"
Tim: "You feelin' froggy? Leap" *Tim stands up waiting for him to actually do it* *Damian is on his last nerve* Damian: "Okay! well here I come"
*fights with Tim*
Jason: "My money is on Damian" Duke: "I'll bet on Tim"
Later Dick: "Stop it!" *enthusiasm noises* Dick: "Love each other!"
*sees them not cooperating* *pushes them together for a hug*
*backfires*
2 hours later Tim, grudgingly hugging Damian because Dick is present: "I'm sorry for being a dick."
Damian, forcibly hugging him and totally not clutching his back with his nails graving his back: "sorry for beating the shit out of you."
Jason: "I'm sorry I'm late. I was busy with something." Tim: *from the hallway* "HE PUSHED ME DOWN THE DAMN STAIRS." x
Riddler: “Riddle me th-“
Batman: “china 1782”
Riddler: “I didn’t even start the riddle! How do yo-“
Batman: “im Batman”
Gordon: "I hate to break it to you but I think your wards/team is dumb." Batman: "Dumb kids?" *Batkids doing random shit on another rooftop+choas* Batman: "Wait- Those are my dumb kids!"
Tim: "Statistically speaking, your 2-step plan won't work like my carefully planned 45 ste-"
Jason: "Statistically speaking, you're a dumbass."
Jason: "Hey Damian, you got anything to drink?"
Damian: "Yeah, in the fridge." Dick: "Hey Jay- Uh- grab me a glass of malk"
Jason: "We don't have any 'malk' but I can get you some milk." Damian: "That's what he just said."
Dick: "Yeah I just want some malk." Jason: "No you're saying it wrong, you're saying 'MALK' like it's a disease."
Damian: "Haha, funny Todd, how do you say it?"
Jason: "I'm saying it the way, everyone ought to say it milk, M I L K."
Damian: "Right like 2 precent."
Dick: "Right whole malk."
Jason: "Nononono, say milkshake"
Dick: "Milkshake"
Jason: "Okay now say milk." Dick: "Malk."
Jason slaps his forehead Jason: "Are you hearing this?"
Damian: "Yeah, the man wants a glass of molk."
Jason: Jason: "Molk?!"
Damian: "Give him the molk Todd!" Bruce outa nowhere: "Damian, inside voices please."
Damian: Sighs "Sorry Father."
Dick: "JAY! POUR ME. A GLASS. OF MALK." Jason: "Why are you yelling at me??" Damian: "Just give him the freakin molk!" Jason: "You guys aren't even saying the same thing!"
Dick: "WE'RE ALL SAYING MALK, JAY." Jason: "No! your saying-"
Damian and Dick: "MaLkkk MaLkkk Malkkk"
Jason, on his last nerves: "..."
Dick: "Moaaaaaaaaaallkkkkkkkkkk" Jason: "SHUT UP"
Dick: ".."
Damian: "." Jason: "JUST SHUT UP"
Jason gets his gun out of his pocket and aims it at his forehead.
Damian: "Put it down, Todd!"
Gets his knife out ready to throw it
Dick proceeds to also get a gun out
Dick: "Don't do it Jay!" Jason: "You're gonna shoot me if I shoot myself?!" Jason: "That doesn't make any sense!"
Damian then aims his knife at his throat, while Dick aims his gun at his forehead.
Dick: "PUT THE GUN DOWN JAY." Damian: "PUT IT DOWN TODD." Jason: "PUT YOUR WEOPENES AWAY!" Jason: "I'M GONNA KILL MYSELF OVER THIS-" Dick: "YOUR LIKE A BROTHER TO ME"
Bruce: "I work alone." Jason: "'I WoRk AlOnE' My ass."
Tim: "I'll take a lemonade"
Jon: "One lemonade coming right-"
Tim: "No baby, I'm not done"
Tim: "I want 2 cubes of sugar and stir it twice after each cube, use a long spoon not a table spoon I can tell the difference, so don't try me. Water should be at 55.7 degrees and I'll take a splash of mint with a lemon wedge on the side. Thank youuu"
Damian: *just pours him lemonade*
Damian: "That will be 1 dollar and 50 cents"
Tim: "This ain't what I ordered."
Jon: "We know but like it's a lemonade stand not a-"
Damian: "All you can eat buffet?"
Jon: "No that's food"
Damian: "They got drinks too"
Tim: "Look the customers always right, and I'm not paying for this"
Damian: "Ughh-"
jon starts singing
Jon: "Fresh lemonade..freshly squeeze.."
Damian: "Jon-"
Jon: "Pour- it in a cup"
Damian: "Jon stop."
Jon: "Can't get enoughh.."