I Keep Forgetting Twitter Is Now X So My Brain Panicked And Went 'TWITTER DIED- Oh, Wait, No It Didn't.

allow me to better this by saying even when Damian(the youngest and has a clear height difference with Bruce) does it, no one notices.

i've just decided you're all wrong and the actual funniest scenario of the league not knowing bruce has kids until they take his place as batman during league meetings is the scenario where bruce never even asked them to pretend to be batman.

when he can't make an important meeting he sends either jason or dick in his place just as themselves, because if he can vouch for them as proxys then why would the league have an issue with it? they just need to show up and say they're there to take notes for batman or something, there's no need to lie. he doesn't even realise that his identity is being stolen until he shows up after a meeting he sent a sub in for and when he shows up everyone is staring at him awkwardly.

batman: what's everybody looking at

green lantern: nothing! we're just... concerned.

flash: yeah... how was your surgery?

batman:

batman: what surgery

green lantern: ...well you ran out of the meeting last week yelling about how you were going to be late for your 'piles removal operation'

green lantern: so uh. how'd it go big guy?

batman:

batman: i wasn't here last week. jason was.

the league:

flash: who the fucks jason

batman:

batman: *slowly turns to superman, who is staring at the table stubbornly*

batman: clark-

superman: THE KIDS SEEMED SO EXCITED TO DRESS UP, I DIDN'T WANT TO BE THE BORING UNCLE AND SAY NO!

bruce ends up calling jason in front of the league to demand an explanation and clear his name. jason straight up doesn't even remember what he did.

jason, on call: oh hey B, thought you were at a JL meeting this afternoon?

bruce: i am. what happened last week?

jason: i sent tim the report to hand over already! i didn't get all of it though, i had to leave real quick towards the end because damian was threatening to set my safe house on fire if i didn't pick him up from school

bruce: and the league let you go early?

jason: yeah i made some excuse, i think i said-

jason: *pauses, remembering what he'd done*

jason: oh my god

bruce lays his head on the table while jason laughs through the loud speaker for the next eight minutes.

POOR BABY! Somebody fix his dirt!

Itchy snoot. 

update, I've got sketches done and I'll give a little info on each one for this au

Touille was the team chef and nutritionist. But nowadays just relaxes and enjoys cooking for the others. During the "incident" that i haven't figured out a cool name for it. Basically all you need to know is Baba is a traitor.(They also are pretty sure Simon killed her to protect the others but they are wrong, but I will be referring to her as dead.) during it, he lost half his tail.

This is Baba in this au. She was the team scout and supplier. During the betrayal incident, she actually did live and went back to working for the Prototype, however she is missing a couple wool patches.

This one is my oc, Michi Token, the team's second in command and wildcard. Or she used to be. She had a very powerful magic based on the celestial body Spica in the constellation Virgo. But somehow during the incident, Baba used some sort of red smoke that completely drained Michi's powers and also puncture her lungs. She managed to survive but now uses an air filter mask and can't use magic. She is very upset about this as before she felt like she could help her team before, but couldn't.

This is Rabie in this au. She was the team's undercover agent and Intel recon agent. In this au, she had an on-again-off-again ex named Tyler and (because for some reason my brain went "what if mama ba?") is her early first trimester of pregnancy. She got a lot of wing tears and scars from the betrayal incident.

This is this au's Poe, the team medic and tactician. Nowadays he's mostly just in charge of everyone making sure to take their meds and take care of themselves. During the betrayal incident he lost his leg, which is obvious. And got a mechanical replacement which he hates as not it causes him to land awkwardly any time he flies.

This is Simon, team captain and kinda a powerhouse. He's very protective and during the betrayal incident, he lost part of his horn and had to kill Baba to protect the others. He feels guilty over it. Not because he feels guilty for attacking her, his team is his hoard and she tried to hurt them, but more like he didn't want to just kill her. He has nightmares about it rarely. He's also super rich and singlehandedly pays for the team. He's fifteenth in line of his home planet, who get buy on the export of gold(which is practically as common as dirt on his planet) but he's very wise with his money.

This is Icky Licky, he was the team sharpshooter and certified tiny beanpole. During the incident, he lost his arm, and got it replaced mechanically. He hates though, because he feels like he isn't as good of a sharpshooter anymore.

This is Maggie, she was the team powerhouse and underwater specialist. She lost parts of her fins in the betrayal incident and can't swim as fast anymore. She also has an adorable pet tarantula named Momo.

This is allister, he was also a team powerhouse, but specialized in melee and security. He has narcolepsy(not sure if it's the right word but it's the condition where he sleeps randomly). He lose his eye in the betrayal incident. Like... the entire eyeball, there's just a socket. He'll usually wear a patch over it(like a bandage patch) but when going somewhere Fancy he'll wear a crystal glass eye Simon got him

(space Rider au belongs to @onyxonline)

*Takes deep breath before screaming

.... So, I got a new phone... And didn't realize my ibis paint account didn't have cloud sync on. So all the Space Riders AU(Which I actually came up with a name for as the Nightmare Crew AU.)

..... Is gone. So.... That's a week I have to redo

I wish to be polite

@onyxonline

Hi, i noticed you didn't have an ask box and I didn't know whether it was okay to build off your au, so I wanted to ask permission to use your way for an idea I had.

Basically the nightmare critters(i noticed in your au they weren't there and I'm not sure if you planned to add them) in this au were the Critter team before the Smiling Critters, but Baba ended up being a traitor and they all got some injuries and had to retire early? I also wanted to really draw my OC Michi Token(a. Red panda) in this au.

i want a blind person superhero who's only power/weapon IS their cane. We're talking beating criminals with it, having little gadgets in it, and whatnot. I want them to also have a seeing eye dog that just has laser eyes or something

Honestly as a blind person I’m so tired of seeing fictional blind characters who don’t use white canes or other guides. “They have special powers so they know what’s around them” or “they’re confident enough to not need a guide” are common tropes, and I’m tired.

Are people scared that using a white cane will make their blind character seem weak? They can’t use a cane because they’re so special that they already know what’s around them, and other blind people who use guides are inferior because they’re not special?

I’m tired. Give your blind characters white canes and other guides. Let them hold onto their friends, let them have guide dogs. Don’t make white cane users feel ostracized for not being “strong enough” to go without.

Another thing that pisses me off is when a sighted character comes up with the fantasy equivalent of braille and teaches it to the blind character. Braille was invented by Louis Braille, a blind man, in 1824. The blind character should be the one coming up with it.

Tldr I’m blind and tired of sighted people lol

🔪 Sighted People MUST Reblog This 🔪

(please pretend this is coming from my OC Misha, I can't get her blog working rn)

Wanna talk villains? My dead big sis had a kid with Bane. Her name is Katherine, I visit every weekend. Nine months in my sister's womb and this baby came out exactly like her daddy.

might start my villain arc this soon gang

my stinky baby. Mr. Dasher Constantine Wayne. Yes, he is named after a reindeer and two DC characters.

NOT ALLESIO

Tim, standing with Jason over the beat up from of a pet groomer: Sir, what happened to you?

Pet groomer: It twas Joker.

Tim, nodding and making a note: okay

Jason, getting a better look at the guy: oh fuck.

Tim: what?

Jason, sighing and pulling out his phone, dialing a contact labeled 'Murder Hobo': one sec

Misha, said Murder Hobo, currently waking up after her werewolf transformation the night before: hello?

jason: Allesio got hurt

Silence and then a cry

Misha: NOT ALLESIO! HE'S THE ONLY ONE IN GOTHAM THAT DOES WEREWOLF GROOMING!

Tim, staring at his brother in silence: who-

Jason, shrugs; she's a friend. Don't worry about it.

PSA!

I will explain when I return from school at around 2:45, but it is my belief that even though the Nightmare Critters are a bit of .. walking red flags in certain ways.

They would be FIERCELY loyal to each other.

I shall explain later

update!

And an extra fact

The first few months after moving in with John when she was still 17(so before he introduced her to the others), Misha would stay up a bit after he fell asleep (usually on the couch while they were watching TV) just to watch him breathe to reassure herself she was safe and that he wasn't going to be gone by morning (like what happened to most people she knew in the compound) and half the time, John wouldn't actually be asleep and would wait for her to be asleep to ruffle her hair and whisper "you're gonna be okay". He didn't know her past not why she seemed so anxious all the time, but knew she was scared of something, so he helped. (He did have an inkling it was something to do with a death of some sort. So, he wasn't too far off.)

Art Sketch

Supposed to be John Constantine giving Misha a haircut. Would've been about a week after she moved in with him. She wanted to cut what she felt was the last ties to a super bad situation, by changing one of the things she used to never be able to, her hair. Of course, he doesn't know the full extent of her past(not the whole compound in Estonia, raised to never expect to live the next day thing), just that she escaped a bad situation and wanted to change her look.

For John, it's just his new roommate asking for help. For Misha, it's a big step in her life, her gaining her freedom and proving she's not a puppet on a string anymore. She doesn't have to live by Mother Veronica's rules anymore. She can be herself. She can be free. And she can trust others to help her when she can't do something herself.

And to her, that's good enough. ❤️