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Stardew Valley Shitposting - Blog Posts

2 years ago

This. This is one of the prime reasons I planned that my farmer would be nonhuman anyways.

please consider how much of a cryptid the farmer is in stardew valley

like

-[stares into space for three hours, completely motionless while waiting for their favorite person to open the door so they can shove a gift in their hands and then immediately runs off]

-they enter the mines. they are knocked unconscious. they enter the mines once more. they are knocked unconscious. harvey begs them to stop. they enter the mines o

-appears from the fukcign...void in the middle of conversations, says one thing, RETURNS TO THE VOID AND REFUSES TO ELABORATE FURTHER

- the farmer has been fishing for 12 straight hours. they eat a fistful of tulips. they continue fishing.

-people don't question why one person needs so much void mayonnaise. they also have stopped noticing when the farmer climbs into the sewer.

-it is your birthday. a farmer kicks open the door at 9 am, hands you an entire chocolate cake, and leaves. you are overjoyed. you do not understand.

-eating an entire pizza in one bite.


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