Eventually-getting-it-together - I'm Doing My Best...ish

never underestimate the power of:

• cleaning off your laptop/computer

• changing your sheets

• straightening up your room

• changing out your toothbrush

• drinking water

• changing the lock/homescreens on your phone

• changing your phone case

• changing your pajamas

• putting on chapstick

• washing your face and putting on moisturizer

• putting lotion on your body

Talent

(via)

Last night I ended up having another anxiety attack before bed. My heart was beating hard and fast and was uncomfortable. I had a stress rash all over my chest. I couldn't stop crying. I had a hard time breathing. I felt like I was going to throw up. It's just the stress of school + not being able to register for a vaccine + feeling pressure from work to in person sub + my grandpa dying about a month ago + my grandma being in the hospital + my mom being the bipolar and manipulative sociopath she is + the whole pandemic. I feel so inadequate sometimes :/

Dark, light, grey, and science

Lmao I'm a mess 😂

academia types ✨✨

dark academia: you have 3 copies of to Kill a Mockingbird, you won't shut up your current obsession, you were too shy to answer questions in class even though you knew every answer. despite being super capable, you still wing a lot of tasks. also self-care but make it ~ edgy ~.

light academia: you're the teachers pet, but like in a good way? you probably tried to learn an instrument like the flute in school but haven't played it since, always holding iced coffee, works way better in an Organised Study Group with like minded pals.

pastel academia: all the coloured highlighters imaginable, and the neatest handwriting? studying anywhere BUT their room (cute café yes please), if you're nice to them they will fall in love with you, you probably haven't seen their natural hair colour.

grey academia: takes lots of notes but can they read them?, cried listening to Greta Thunberg in 1975's song, "gender is a social construct", surprisingly good at time management, probably short and angry, constantly trying to tell their parents how to be "woke."

classic academia: your cat is your best friend, always dreamt about having a bookstore café when you were older, definitely participating in goodreads reading challenge, you shock friends on your ability to always sleep on time, quiet until people get to know you (and discover you're ~quirky~)

science academia: you are not capable of liking things casually: it's all or nothing, constantly complaining about how difficult your subjects are but knowing this is exactly what you want to do, well practiced at pulling all-nighters, probably got some sort of nerdy/edgy tattoo.

I can actually read my notes for once!

Today I:

●went to a virtual comp class that was a total waste of time

●partially caught up on week 8 module videos for my stats class

●added the video content to my running review for the stats class

●went to a virtual 2 hour group meeting for that stats class (so unnecessarily long and dumb)

●took a practice quiz

●started some practice problems

●studied outside! (For a little bit- still quarantined so it was in my backyard and there's very little shade and the umbrella isn't big enough to accommodate sun movements)

MATLAB has an Onramp kind of crash course. I'm gonna be honest... I don't think many people know how to use MATLAB well. It has potential, but it just isn't used a lot (in my opinion). Congrats on the internship tho! It sounds like you'll learn a lot and it will be a cool experience!

03.02.2021

I finally got an internship, I start in a month! I'm going to improve/adapt a code used to analyse exoplanets data. I'm a bit scared as it will be "translating" MATLAB to Julia, and I never used either language, so if anyone has any resources, I'm taking it!

On other news, we are doing an intensive English week with my class, and it's... Not that bad. But I made it even better with homemade waffles!

Hahaha my aunt ended up coming over and a couple other things happened so I barely got through this list. At least I know what I'm doing tomorrow! Also, I had to sus through about 60 pages of content standards so oof

Today I am trying to get ahead with my classes. My classes started this past Wednesday and it is now Saturday. I feel very disorganized because my asynchronous classes have me completing modules, but not all of the due dates are posted. It's really hard to find a schedule, but I'm going to set that up today. Today I'm working on:

1) reading curriculum guidelines on online experiences

2) making my initial discussion post about it

3) finding an old algebra or geometry textbook in my basement to help me brainstorm ideas for the 5+ hours of related internet instruction I'll be creating for a class

4) setting up an outline of my first lesson plan

5) reading 2 short chapters for another class

6) watching a presentation

7) looking at a long term assignment

8) making another initial discussion post

*I'd work at my desk but my father currently has Netflix blaring and is snoring. I can still hear literally everything but this is the quietest room in the house. If I go near him I'm probably going to end up screaming at him about how impossible it is to work in this house. My state is currently in full shut down (no indoor dining, no libraries for studying, I'm not allowed on school campus, etc). I guess my room is as good as it gets.

3. 29. 21 //

A word of wisdom: mind maps aren't supposed to make any sense, they're just suppoesd to get your thoughts down on paper!

I'm literally in love with this idea. I am trying to read more often. A lot of my classes are teaching/math heavy so I feel guilty reading outside of those classes, but I'm looking to change that this semester. This looks so cool!

my book journal is literally the only thing in my life that I have committed to and do consistently