107 posts
Latest Posts by stupidstuffpeoplesay - Page 3
“He’s such an overprotective mother hen sometimes.”
-My friend, while literally talking about Satan
“It should be easier once we get rid of the pile of noses...”
-My mother, not making nearly as much without context
“Elizabeth, what’s your name?”
-my mother
“Need I remind you of your grandmother’s murderous intentions?”
-Me, probably about to get murdered by one of my friends grandmas
“I’m as straight as this ruler!”
-Me, while snapping my ruler in half
“Your homework is to pee in a jar for a week...”
-My science teacher
“That’s a Cavendish banana, you shithead.”
-me, to one of my closest friends
“So how will you guys walk into hell?”
-me, on a group chat
I should probably clarify that this was in a game
Convesation between my mum and brother
Brother: He was in the way so we killed him
Mum: You killed your friend in his sleep?
B: It gets worse…
M: …
B: …
M: …
B: We skinned him.
M: …
B: We needed the leather!
He ate his friend. He ate his fucking friend
Convesation between my mum and brother
Brother: He was in the way so we killed him
Mum: You killed your friend in his sleep?
B: It gets worse…
M: …
B: …
M: …
B: We skinned him.
M: …
B: We needed the leather!
They are now talking about wearing his friend
Convesation between my mum and brother
Brother: He was in the way so we killed him
Mum: You killed your friend in his sleep?
B: It gets worse…
M: …
B: …
M: …
B: We skinned him.
M: …
B: We needed the leather!
Convesation between my mum and brother
Brother: He was in the way so we killed him
Mum: You killed your friend in his sleep?
B: It gets worse...
M: ...
B: ...
M: ...
B: We skinned him.
M: ...
B: We needed the leather!
“Jaffa cakes are terrifying!”
-My friend, who is genuinely scared of the orange part of Jaffa cakes
“I consulted the stars and they said fuck you.”
-Me
“You’re the kind of person who invades a medieval castle in the winter.”
-My brother
“We thought it was a toilet chain!”
-My grandma, talking about my great grandmother’s very expensive jewelry
“You’ve got a crazy grandma.”
-my grandma, being so right
“She’s come out the closet!”
-My grandma... when I told her I was vegetarian
“Are you sure you’re a human being? You have no belly button.”
-My aunt to my grandma
“Chicken groin.”
-My grandma, meaning chicken thigh
“That’s my second claim to fame; I was once told off by a rodent!”
-My grandma, who once got shouted at by Mickey Mouse at Disney Land
Spending time with my family... I am definitely going to hear some stupid things
That’s the culprit
“MEEEOOOWWWW!”
-My cat. Loudly. In my face. At 3am. Every night.
“Karl Marx was a frickin’ babe.”
-A very strange person who was once sent the entire communist manifesto and just replied “hot”
“Hula Hoops are the food of the Gods!”
-Me, being right
“I would make a better Hitler than Hitler!”
-My brother
“Stop breaking this pencil! Do you know how expensive this was?!”
-Somebody with a cheap pencil they probably found on the floor
“I do NOT have slugs on my face!”
-Someone who, as I can confirm, did not have slugs on their face
I... I just saw a kid with a jar of Nutella. He just brought Nutella to school in his backpack and took it out in maths.